Gun jokes
If you shoot at a school of fish, could you call it a school shooting?
What has more brains than a student in a school shooting? The wall behind them.
A lady asked if I heard about the mass shooting in Ohio. I said yes, my friend died there. She said I’m so sorry. I said yeah, I tried telling him the police had good aim. Worse than that, he just found out his sister was cheating on him.
I went to my local shooting range today but was surprised when I saw on the news that there was a school shooting in my shooting range. I don't know who snitched...
What's a fetus' favorite gun? A micro SMG.
Who would win in a fight, in a boxing ring? Mike Tyson or Helen Keller with a Tommy gun?
Mike Tyson. Helen Keller never heard the bell.
A suicidal customer walks into a gun store.
Cashier: Is this your final purchase?
Customer: Actually, yes it is!
What's the rarest gun you can find in Africa? A water gun.
I saw two blind men fighting at the mall. I yelled, "He has a gun!" They both ran.
Dwayne “the Rock” Johnson has made a laudable, command decision to omit real firearms from his movie sets.
This being the case, he ought to produce, direct, and star in his next movie titled: “The Rubber Gun Squad!” 👌 😉
▄【デc̷a̷t̷══━一.
Spread the cat gun.
We gotta keep it goin' ▄【デc̷a̷t̷══━一.
Once I almost died. I'll give it another shot out of the gun to finish my job.
German XP farms: Train carrying chained guys.
American XP farms: Walking up to a school with a gun.
African XP farms: Cotton field.
What's the difference between a gun and a penis?
The American government does not define you as having the constitutional right to a penis.
Why did the school shooter earn extra points?
Because he was on a kill streak.
So, as a school shooter, I try to remember my ABC's. A, B, C, D, E, F, GUN!
And I basically stop at G, since no students ever speak to me about the rest.
A B C D E F GUN.
There's this smart way to sneak a calculator into school. I've heard of it. You take the calculator, put it in a gun magazine, put the magazine in the gun, and bring the gun to school!
When you're in the middle of a test and you hear gun shots.