Grammar jokes
Spell IHOP, then say "ness."
The general proofreading Hitler's speeches was the original Grammar Nazi.
What are chocolate's preferred gender pronouns?
Her-she.
Your Roblox friend counts to 10, but she doesn't count to "too." Then Roblox says: "Damn. Your Roblox friend can't count."
"Want to hear a joke about pizza? Never mind, it is too cheesy."
"YOU MORON ITS *TOO* not TO, IM GOING TO EAT YOU ALIVE AND RIP OUT YOUR PROSTATE"
Why are there 25 letters in the alphabet? Because the D is in U.
What did the 5 say to the S?
"Nice shape."
I hate it when people say age is only a number. Age is clearly a word.
Why is 6 afraid of 7?
Because seven eight (ate) nine.
Does this sentence make any sense?
What are Michael Jackson’s sexual pronouns? Hee hee!
What pronouns does Michael Jackson use? Hee/hee.
Are you in the alphabet 'cause I wanna give you the D.
A colon can completely change the meaning of a sentence.
Jane ate her friend’s sandwich.
Jane ate her friend’s colon.
I am trying to re-comment something that used to be on here, but is no longer on here.
Here are some rules to make a good joke:
1: Don't say “my life.”
2: Proofread your joke and make sure people can read it/have good grammar in it.
3: And don’t repost things (although this last one is hypocritical because this was me trying to repost something, but it is still a good rule to go by).
What’s the Difference Between a Cat and a Comma?
One has claws at the end of its paws, and the other is a pause at the end of a clause.
I'm friends with 2 letters of the alphabet. I don't know why.
I am only familiar with 25 letters of the alphabet.
I don't know why.
A mom says to her son: "Hey, can you wave to that deaf kid over there?"
The son: "I don't know, can I?"
The mom: "May you?"
The son: "No, I don't have any arms!"
What do 7 year old girls want?
To be ate!