Today we need to teach our teens about having safe sex while using contraceptives.
Condoms 99 percent effective.
Birth control 99 percent effective.
Etc.
Just be like me and use underage 7 year olds works 100 percent of the time (only cost 20 years in jail ;)
How do you tell the difference between a Communist and everybody else? The way they are spelled.
The moment when you tell an illegal immigrant to go home and he walks to the jail cell and closes it.
What does NASA stand for? Need Another Seven Astronauts.
What did the Brit say to the American?
Well here comes fascism.
💡 idea. Start a confidential organization that only recruits via invite. Stockpile heavy duty weapons in an si when the time comes we can defend America from any domestic threat. *just a silly idea*
Did you hear they just took Biden to the hospital?
No, what happened?
He couldn’t stop pootin!
Me running from the principal because I put ten woman's rights books in the fictional section!
Yo mama is Obama.
Trump really fractured the US with his 1/6 insurrection...
What do you call a Democrat that is a progressive?
A Democrat that lost in a presidential election.
Trump, just why?
Why is Donald Trump under so much stress?
Because he signed up to be on an album where somebody says "no love for the rich" on it.
Scientist time travels into the year 2024.
Scientist: So, what happened with the storming of Area 51?
Pedestrian: Oh, you mean The 51 Massacre?
The Israeli government is the biggest joke of all.
What’s the difference between a cow and Hitler jokes?
You can’t milk the cow after 12 years.
What do you call two old men drooling in their wheelchairs?
The 2028 US election.
I was looking at our Human Services Minister and thinking I'm surprised he's married.
The things you do for your cousins!
What does Donald Trump say when he declares war? Nuke them.
What does a pervert say when he declares war? Nude them.
Biden: See you later, alligator!
Alligator: In a while, pedophile.
What's white, red, blue, and brown all over?
The American flag I used to wipe my ass with.
