Yo everyone! My sis is pregnantš, Iām gonna be a dad!
pregnant teen: im pregnant my mums gonna kill me. Unborn baby: my mums gonna kill me
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
Today i find out that my cat got hit by a car accident, wellp i guess im gonna play ninja fruits on my hands again, Its not like anyone will notice.
Shit Iām never gonna try commit suicide again ,I almost died
wood fired pizza?
hows pizza gonna pay child support now?! :O
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A boy and girl in high school started dating for a while and things were going so well that the girl decided to invite the boy on a weekend trip. She said "I want you to come spend the weekend at our lakehouse and meet my parents. While we're there, I'd also like to take our relationship to the next level." "I'm there" the boy replied. The boy was so excited that he ran straight to the pharmacy to pick up some protection. He walked up to the pharmacist and told him about his weekend to come and said he needed some condoms. The pharmacist asked "do you want the 3 pack, 6 pack, or family sized 24 pack?" the boy replied " "I plan on getting busy all weekend. I'm not gonna stop pounding her till I'm black and blue. Give me the family pack." "Sure thing" said the pharmacist. That weekend the boy went to the lakehouse and the whole family was sitting down at the dinner table to pray. the girls father asked the boy to say grace. The boy prayed and prayed. Almost ten minutes went by. Finally, the girl leaned over to the boy and said, "you never told me that you were so religious" the boy replied, "You never told me that your dad was a pharmacist"
What do you come a dog with no legs? It don't matter what you it, cause it ain't gonna come to you.
The twin towers shouldve known they were gonna get hit when there mom said here comes the airplane!
How I Punch my Brother:Wooden Sword How he is it telling Dad:Diomand Sword How hard my Dad is gonna punch me:Warden Punch
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
my mom told me to make my dad smile and she will give me $100, so i said ''the cowboys are gonna win the superbowl'' he smiled but my mom didn't give it to me, anyways i forgot about my package coming and the mailman came and i said ''i like your hat teal looks nice on you'' and he smiled and my mom gave me $100.
Punch an orphan in the face what they gonna do? Tell there parents
Puns: I have a friend whose birthday is on September 11th. They're going to have an explosive party, that will definitely blow you away. It's gonna be the bomb, and a blast too!
Why didnt the orphan cross the road? Where was he gonna go?
What did one saggy boob say to the other? We better start getting some support around here, or people are gonna think we're nuts!
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
if I don't find a reason to live soon my ceiling fan isn't the only thing that's gonna be hanging from my ceiling
What is an orphan's excuse to leave a party?
"I'm gonna make like my parents and run.
Teacher: Iām gonna call ur parents Orphan: go on see if they pick up
