Gonna

Gonna jokes

Birthday

I have a friend whose birthday is on September 11th.

They're going to have an explosive party that will definitely blow you away!

It's gonna be the bomb, and a blast, too!

Orphan

What is an orphan's excuse to leave a party?

"I'm gonna make like my parents and run."

Ceiling fan

If I don't find a reason to live soon, my ceiling fan isn't the only thing that's gonna be hanging from my ceiling.

Memes

Boob

What did one saggy boob say to the other?

"We better start getting some support around here, or people are gonna think we're nuts!"

Rape

Roses are red... Violets are blue... I feel like I'm gonna get raped next to you.

Orphan

Teacher: I’m gonna call your parents.

Orphan: Go on, see if they pick up.

Suicide

Me, calls the police*

Me: Hey, I'm gonna commit suicide!

Cop on the phone: Please wait till we get there.

Me: Why, so you can then stop me?

Cop on the phone: No, we just want a murder, not a suicidal report on your paper... and we are all bored!

Me: Ok, my house number is *********************, ok!

Cop on the phone: Awesome! Just a sec. *whispers* Guys, I finally found someone who wants to get killed!

Orphan

Principal: You're being bad. I'm gonna need to call your parents!

Orphan: *sits there sadly*

Butter

I was gonna tell a rumor about butter, but I don’t want to spread it.

Comeback

Ex-Boyfriend: You have no ass, so we're through!

Me: Stop being a dickhead, dude!! It ain't gonna make your little sausage any bigger!

Uranus

Oh baby, there's about to be 7 planets because I'm gonna destroy Uranus.

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  • Orphan

    When I'm bored, I like to slap orphans. I mean, what are they gonna do, tell their parents?

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  • Emo kid

    Don't make fun of the emo kid, or he's gonna bring his friends and you gotta fight the Suicide Squad.

    Grandma

    I find it best to screw people with memory loss. I mean, what's my grandma gonna do? Describe me to the cops?

    Roblox

    One day I was texting my friend on Roblox and I made her mad. She told me she was gonna kill me.

    That night, she told me to meet her at the bathroom at 2 PM sharp, but she made "sharp" in all caps. So I went to the bathroom at 2 PM the next day. Now I know what she meant by "SHARP" on Roblox... she brought a knife, and I was in hell by then. Like for the next part!