Premise 1: IF God exists, he exists.
Premise 2: If God exists, he exists.
Premise 3: IF God exists, he definitely exists.
Conclusion: Therefore he exists.
Me, holding a baby: "Oh my God, it's so cute!"
Also me: "Throw it."
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Golly.
Golly who?
Godly leave me alone!
Son: I heard mom got stung by a few bees this morning. Is she ok? Hospital?
Dad: She's ok now, no hospital.
Dad: She had to take the deep penis.
Son: Umm...... WHAT!?
Dad: I had to inject her with an EPIC PENIS.
Dad: Oh for god's sakes.
Dad: Epi Pen.
Freddy: I'm coming for you >:)
Me: God, no, help!
*game notification pops up with very loud sound*
What's the difference between a God and my mom?
My mom exists. I mean... she did at one point! Unlike any "Gods."
Orphan: I finally have a father!
God: And who is that?
Orphan: You!
God: Who the hell is you? Well, it's not me.
Orphan: :l