Go jokes

School teacher: "Hey kid, why don't you just go home to your family?"

Orphan: "My family never came back for me."

School teacher: "Your daddy must've really needed that milk."

What's the difference between my girlfriend and my uncle?

My girlfriend didn't go to jail for loving me.

How do you make a suicidal guy go bungee jumping?

Tie the bungee cord around his neck.

When you are going back to where you live from a place that is a time zone behind where you live:

"Looks like I am going back to the future!"

I'm going to make a city just for people with special needs.

I'll call it Downtown.

Why did God build a stairway to heaven?

So all the disabled people will have to go to hell.

I think it’s dumb that people say a woman belongs in the kitchen.

How else is the rest of the house going to get cleaned?

So my teacher's daughter committed suicide.

One day I'ma go up to her and say, "What's wrong, did Logan Paul leave your daughter hanging?"

North Korea and the Martians were fighting about who was going to reach Venus first.

Trump steps in and says, "That doesn't matter, America is going to land on the sun first."

The Martians and North Korea said, "You can't land on the sun, it's too hot and you will die."

Trump said his brilliant plan, "America is going to land there at night."

I'm really worried for Stephen Hawking, 'cause how is he going to climb the stairway to Heaven?

How do you make a cat go "woof"?

... douse it in gasoline and set it on fire! "woof!"

1. You're so dumb, you think Cheerios are donut seeds!

2. You're so fat, you could sell shade!

3. You're just like coconut water, nobody likes you!

4. Have you been shopping lately? Because they're selling lives around the corner, you should go get one!

If being ugly was a crime, you would get a life sentence!!

Are these good?

What do you do if you're ever attacked by a gang of clowns?

Go for the juggler!

Stop saying negative shit about dark humor jokes! If it bugs you that bad, then go away! That'll solve everything but world hunger and failed abortion.

There was a magician on board the Titanic and said that he could make anything disappear.

Once the ship had gone down one of the passengers said to him, "Go on, so what did you do with the ship then?"

PERSON: I need to go so bad!

TOILET: Long time no pee!!!

What's the difference in Japanese Kamikaze and 9/11?

There is none, they both go up in flames.

The Titanic before the iceberg be like: "We can't go under it, we gotta go through it!"

Jesus said to his disciples, "Go forth and ye shall receive eternal life." Thomas came fifth, however, so he only got a toaster.

What is similar between sex and fishing?

It doesn't matter how deep you go, it matters how you wiggle the worm.