Go jokes
Why don't orphans go to the shops? Because when their mum leaves, she's never coming back.
Your mom is so ugly, she made the devil go to church.
What do you call a warrior that's going to bed?
A knight knight.
Where do math teachers go on vacation? Times Square.
SPOILER ALERT...
I was going to tell you a joke about Thanos, but T. S. snapped it away!
It did not rain very often when Chuck Norris was a kid.
Why?
Because his favorite childhood song was "Rain Rain Go Away."
Fat people are like the Twin Towers. Once they go down, they don’t come back up.
I work in a garage, and yesterday a gay person came up to me and said, "Why won't my car go straight?"
Whenever I go to bed, my wife disappears, but whenever I turn on the lights at night, she’s back in bed.
A dad tells his son, "Stop masturbating! If you do it too long, you will go blind."
The son replied, "Dad, I'm over here!"
Guy: Whose place? Mine or yours?
Girl: Both. You go to yours, and I'll go to mine.
What website should you go to to look up LSD dealers?
TripAdvisor.com
What school does a depressed middle school kid go to?
KMS.
I'm actually against abortion.
Just go to the car wash and tell 'em you ate too much red pasta!
There are too many suicidal people in this world. I’m going to make sure there is at least one less.
Mom tells her son to go to the other kid, to walk to the kid just standing still, to clap so the kid can hear and move out of the way of the car.
But her son was blind, the other kid had no legs so he couldn't walk, and the kid has no arms so he couldn't clap, and the kid died because he couldn't hear; he was deaf.
There are two siblings, a little brother and a big brother. Now, the big brother had a girlfriend, and one night they decided to go and have sex. So, the bigger brother goes to pick up his girlfriend one night and take her home. So they get to the bigger brother's house and walk into his room. Now the two siblings shared the room, and they had bunk beds. When they walked in the room, they saw the little brother asleep in the bottom bunk, so they went up to the top bunk to have sex. The big brother says, "Whenever you feel good, say 'lettuce,' and whenever you want to switch positions say 'tomato'." The girl constantly is saying "lettuce, tomato," and then the little brother wakes up. He quietly remarks, "Can you guys stop making sandwiches? You're getting mayonnaise all over me."
A teenage boy decides to go see a hooker for the first time and asks his experienced uncle for some tips.
"Uncle, what should I do about the hooker name? Should I ask her real name or should I come up with a name for her myself?"
"Kid, I've been fucking hookers for 20 years and I didn't even know they had names."
Race car backwards is race car, but if you turn race car sideways, that’s how Paul Walker got sent to God’s inbox.
What's the difference between my girlfriend and my uncle?
My girlfriend didn't go to jail for loving me.