Go jokes
A husband and wife get into a fight. The wife says, "Go blow off some steam. I’ll let you fuck a hooker." So he does that, comes back, and says, "I’m off the hook now!"
Girl: Dad, where are you?
Dad: I went to go get milk.
Girl: But we have milk.
Dad: I know, I just don't love you.
Me: "Hey, you trashy pig woman, go in the toilet or lay on the grass where you belong."
Trashy pig woman: "Why?"
Because you smell like fart, and you're pretty much just a turd with lips.
Why didn't the orphan go home?
Because he didn't have a home.
You’re so fat; if you go outside now, you’d be arrested for breaking social distancing guidelines.
Why can't an orphan go on away games?
Their parent will never show up!
Where did Tanner go during the 9/11 terrorist attack?
Everywhere.
When people tell me to "go to hell," I tell them their address.
A man got pulled over, and the policeman had stepped out and said, "Do you know how fast you were going?"
The man said, "I was trying to catch up with the traffic."
The officer said, "There is no traffic."
The man said, "Exactly, that’s how far behind I am!"
When the speedbump in a school zone screams, so you go faster.
Today I was asked to go out by 17 women. Well, I was in the women's bathroom. 💀
You’re Russian when you go to the bathroom and Finnish when you come out. What are you in the bathroom?
European.
Why do orphans always go to white vans when someone asks?
Because they want to feel wanted.
Your hairline be going up and down like a Formula 1 car!
Why have kids? Just go get one now, no nine-month delay.
A wife decided to leave for a vacation, leaving her husband in supervision of her mother and her cat. After a few days, she called her husband and asked, “How is everything going?”
He responded with, “The cat is dead.”
She cried out and said, “Why couldn’t you have broken the news slowly? You could have said the cat is playing on the roof or on the first day, and the next say it broke its leg, then the next that the poor thing's dead! Anyways, how’s my mom?”
“She’s playing on the roof.”
Do you ever get that feeling where you're just going through a school parking lot, then you realize that there are no parking lots?
Why did the orphan go to rob the bank? Because he wanted to be wanted! >:D
This guy called anonymous said he's going to own me like he did my mum. Joke's on him, I have two dads.
I heard Kobe was writing a book about helicopters, but it just wouldn't land with people...
I know, I'm going to hell!