Girlfriend

Girlfriend jokes

Guy

Why is it inappropriate when guys say their girlfriends are their “Partners in Crime”?

Like we get it, bro, she’s underage.

Michael Jackson

Michael Jackson

Why didn't Michael Jackson have a girlfriend? He's afraid of women.

Name

My girlfriend's name is Candice.

Can these nuts fit in your mouth? :D

Memes

Period

My girlfriend said she's having a horrible time with her period. I ask her which one, but realize she's not talking about school...

We don't see each other very much.

Animal

My girlfriend said to me, "Dear, I think you have hit an animal, there's blood and dents all over the bonnet."

I said, "No, love, I'm not waiting for a Black Lives Matter rally."

Neck

Always breathing down my neck, my vampire girlfriend does not give me any space.

Hobo

A hobo couple is making out under a bridge.

The girlfriend goes: - Johnny, why is your dick so soft? - Flip me over, I’m trying to shit!

Orphanage

Bully: How’s your girlfriend?

Kid: I don’t have one. How are your parents?

Bully: *cries*

Kid: *Walks out of the orphanage*

Similarity

What makes Stephen Hawking and your dumped girlfriend similar?

They can't stand up for themselves.

Hairline

I bet your hairline goes inside your private part, and your girlfriend can’t even touch it.

Butt

Your butt is bigger than my ex-girlfriend's butt, and I love it!

Relationship

Hey, who thinks Gwen and Aiden are not dating, and who also thinks this dumb girl named "Zre" is being a dummy? And who thinks Gwen belongs with Prince, aka boyfriend?

Incest

how old are my girlfriends

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EjBTsoYph48 oh and there my little sisters

Sex

My girlfriend who is a Jehovah's Witness had sex with me so hard, she turned to Christianity.

Guy

Nothing makes a guy happier than when his girlfriend says, “Go and lock the door first...”

Father

When you go to your girlfriend's house but accidentally go into her dad's room and fuck him anyway.

Sex

I heard my neighbors having sex, and it was annoying me, so I called my girlfriend to ask if she wanted to go out, but when I called her, I heard my neighbors' phone ringing.