School Bully: How's your girlfriend? Oh wait, you don't have any! Me: How's your parents? Oh wait, you don't have any! *Continues to burn down orphanage
one day i caught my sister talking to my girlfriend and she said "you never told me your Lesbian" and i said "no,not at all" my girlfriend ask "why did you not tell her" and i said " because every time i bring a girl home i hear to much noise in her room and i never get the chance to kiss them because she's cleaning the trash" and she said "yeah,the trash is her junk"
My asian girlfriend has a wierd name. As I gave her anal, she was yelling "I'm tu yung."
Who do you call someone that steals his brothers girlfriend and disowned by his whole family? Brandon
Face-Timing My Girlfriend:
̈Hey girl! Are you a veterinarian? Because these puppies are sick! ̈ *shows muscle*
My heart broke as I went down up the stairs and my girlfriend broke her ♥️ heart
There were two two twin brothers Lucas and Marcus. Marcus got a girl friend while Lucas stayed single. A few weeks later Lucas was caught kissing Marcus's girlfriend and Marcus comes over and says: "Babe I know we're twins but I'm Marcus and that's Lucas you were kissing." and his girlfriend looks at him and says: "I know."
I'm 34 and I went on a date with my 19 year old girlfriend, I got heckled with "you're a paedophile!" and "you sick F...!" Completely ruined our 10th anniversary!
I asked my girlfriend if we could try my rape fantasy last night. She said no. It was the best night of my life.
I lit my girlfriend on fire. I guess you could say I ignited her fire.
My Girlfriend asked "why is this test so long and hard?" I then said "you know what else is long and hard..." She was amazed!
Kenny can't find a girlfriend because neither of his sisters can fuck as good as his mom could.
What’s red, nine inches long , and makes my girlfriend cry every time she sees it?
Her abortion
Guy: shows girlfriend his dick girlfriend: " cool where is it?"
when you accidently choke your girlfriend to death and then realize that its your sister so who gives a f..k
😏😏😕As We Speak Now Someone Is Making Arrangement For December With Your Girlfriend 😂😂😂
Whats red, 6 inches long and makes my girlfriend cry when I feed it to her ?
Her miscarriage
WHAT DOES YOU GIRL DO TO ME? SHE SUCKS ME OFF
If your blind girlfriend says you have a big cock she's probably just pulling you're leg
