Girlfriend Jokes

This joke includes potentially sensitive content.

My girlfriend asked me to tell a joke. I told her to look in the mirror. We never met again

My girlfriend broke up with me because I have a small dick to bad for her because I give good sex

yeah she said do you love me, i said only partly i love my bed and my mommy im sorry.

My girfriend called me a pedaphile.....Thats a big word for a 1st grader

What is you main food Me:pizza cause i'm cheesy Friend: Chocolate chips cause i have a lot of friends Girlfriend: donut cause i have a lot of cream

Guys my girlfriend calls me: 911 help there’s a strange man in my room and I think he’s on drugs!

She’s so nice

My girlfriend is born at 29 February, so does that mean she is 2 years old🤔

When your girlfriend has been vomiting for 2 weeks and you find out she’s not pregnant Bf-*yes I knew it was a prank* She has cancer

I used to have a girlfriend, who would argue with me a lot for no reason, I look at her feet and say to her, here is £15 give yourself a foot pedicure then come back to me it clearly shows you have man feet, you are a woman you should have woman feet, no wonder you boss me around too much as if your the man of the house.

My girlfriend is soo fat that when she runs or walk she falls so I am breaking up with u

🙍🏼‍♀️Fat girlfriend: nooo don’t leave me catch me ahhh

🙇🏼‍♀️Fat girlfriend falls on boyfriend:ahhhhhh *dump*

🙇🏼‍♀️🙇🏼Fat girlfriend and boyfriend:fat girlfriend:u didn’t catch me wawawawa:boyfriend: get off me 900 pounds ugh I hate u

Story done pls like

My teacher asks all of us in class what is your favorite thing in the world? Josh: Cookies-Jacob-My parents-Erika-My Friends!-Brody-Lamborghinis.-Me-Pulling over in a car in the middle of nowhere at night with my girlfriend and getting in the back seat where the magic happens.... ;)-My Teacher-Ok every one that was all good..... WAIT A DANG SECOND *Everyone Looks at Me With A Weird Face....

I saw a guy beat his girlfriend to a pulp after his girlfriend threw a phone in his face I offered to call an ambulance but he said he was fine

Face-Timing My Girlfriend:

̈Hey girl! Are you a veterinarian? Because these puppies are sick! ̈ *shows muscle*

when your girlfriend tells you shes a guy "what bitch naw hell no"

I call my girlfriend .05 because she's a bag I blow into when I've had a few drinks.

why is it so hard to break up with a Japanese girlfriend? you have to drop the bomb twice before she gets it.

STOP POSTING ABOUT AMONG US! I'M TIRED OF SEEING IT! MY FRIENDS ON TIKTOK SEND ME MEMES, ON DISCORD IT'S FUCKING MEMES! I was in a server, right? and ALL OF THE CHANNELS were just among us stuff. I-I showed my champion underwear to my girlfriend and t-the logo I flipped it and I said "hey babe, when the underwear is sus HAHA DING DING DING DING DING DING DING DI DI DING" I fucking looked at a trashcan and said "THAT'S A BIT SUSSY" I looked at my penis I think of an astronauts helmet and I go "PENIS? MORE LIKE PENSUS" AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHGESFG