Get jokes

What do you call an Asian who gets a B?

It's not a B-sian.

Dead.

What do you get when you cross a vampire and a snowman?

Frostbite.

My wife (or husband) told me to get six cans of Sprite from the grocery store.

I had just realized when I got home that I had picked up 7-Up.

Never compare an orphan to an Apple because the Apple always gets picked.

Every time a Light Saber goes off, it's just a Jedi Master getting hard over a kid. Lol.

There are perks to bringing an emo to the grocery store; you can get coupons by scanning their wrist.

If you got a priest, a Rhodes scholar, and a politician in a room, what would you get?

The Royal Commission.

Alternatively, Tony Abbott.

Your mum is so fat, when I see her, I get depressed.

What do you get when you cross a vampire with a teacher?

Lots of blood tests!

When the class plays hangman, the emos get inspired!

What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?

An apple gets picked.

Sometimes I get jealous when my phone dies. (This does not apply to me. It's a joke.)

What do women and screen doors have in common? The more you bang them, the looser they get.

Just told Putin to get some b*tches.

Waiting for 3801 missiles to strike my house.

Why can't an orphan play baseball? Because he can't get home.

They told me a mask was enough to get into the supermarket.

They lied, everybody else was also wearing pants.

I saw a bus the other day with some boy scouts at the back. One of them was having fun getting his knot-tying badge.

Sometimes I get jealous when my phone dies.

Why? You ask.

Because it only takes one charge to bring it back to life.

Every second, 1 kid gets diagnosed with homework.

What's the difference between a paralyzed kid and a father?

The father gets to leave, while the kid stays.