Today, a kid in a wheelchair was rolling around the class to get away from this one annoying kid, so I told him, "Brayden, just get up and walk away."
Get Jokes
I get jealous when my phone dies.
Why did he die? He forgot to get a new GPU for his new PC.
They told me a mask was enough to get into the supermarket.
They lied, everybody else was also wearing pants.
I saw a bus the other day with some boy scouts at the back. One of them was having fun getting his knot-tying badge.
Every second, 1 kid gets diagnosed with homework.
What’s the difference between an orphan and an apple tray?
The apples get picked.
What is the difference between apples and orphans?........... The apple gets picked.
Why do prepubescent orphan girls love pedophiles? Because they get to call someone “Daddy”.
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?
The apple gets picked.
Why aren't orphans scared of getting in trouble at school?
Because they can't call their parents.
What do you call a dude that is always high and gets higher than everyone else in the family? The alpha pothead!
You think on a airplane when a muslim guy gets on, people look at him and think... "Aw, fuck."
What will fall faster, an emo or an apple?
An apple, because the emo would get caught on the rope.
Where do orphans get their stuff from?
The reject shop.
What do you call it when Panera Bread gets painted red?
Panera Red.
Dark humor is like food; some people get it, others don't...
What's worse than a dead baby?
A pile of dead babies.
What's worse than that?
One's alive at the bottom.
What's even worse than THAT?
It eats it's way out.
Wait it gets worse...
It goes back for seconds.
Just one more I swear...
It fucks one of it's siblings at the bottom.
Why is Death the world's biggest slut?
Death gets to f*** everyone.
Elderly man: Can I get a discount, please? I fought in World War 2.
Cashier: Sure!
Elderly man: Danke.
