Get jokes
How do you get a squirrel down from a tree?
You pull down your pants and show it your nuts.
My mom said, "Take out the trash," and I said, "Okay." The next day she asked, "Where is your sister?" and I said, "In line to get crushed."
When my dog barks, he gets ruff.
When my dog starts to bark, he starts to get ruff.
Why did the van cross the road?
To get to the school for the little kids.
I got my sister a trampoline for her birthday, but she won’t get out of her wheelchair and use it.
I hate people who get offended here, like seriously, it's called dark humor for a reason.
What do you call milk that gets everything she wants?
Spoiled milk.
A man and a boy are walking into a forest. It begins to get dark. The boy says "Mister, I'm scared." The man replies "How do you think I feel, I have to walk back alone."
Why did Steven Hawking die?
He lost Wi-Fi connection and didn't get the data plan.
What is Trump's favorite snack?
Cheetos.
(Get it? He looks like a Cheeto!)
101 pedo jokes.
Why's everything x2, need to get this shit dick off before the coppers come, it's called women taking advantage, you'll shit the bitcoin, 90% percent of pedo's who don't admit they're like kids blame the police, shit your kappas, you only want my veins why don't you inject me with smack, run in with ya black armbands, I've been sized for a million pound, stop giving me strain asking questions, I know what's going to happen next, bet the judge is a women, jealous coz your drink tastes like shit?
Is it coz your shit though? How many bids have you done? Shit 1 million views, don't try bribe me, did the police give me snip? How's my barbie doll or shall I say my little pony? The police beat fuck outta me, what's all these needle marks on my arm, I can tell you want something, why's everything like one big cycle, police own the dark web.
Keep it going on lol.
Stephen Hawking isn't dead, he's just can't walk to the shop and get new batteries. 🙄
What do you get when you cross an octopus with a Mexican?
I don't know, but man can it pick lettuce.
Anyone know how to get an A on the "An Inspector Calls" section of the GCSE paper?
What do you get when you cross a bunny and a Rottweiler? Just the Rottweiler.
You're the bunny, and I'm the Rottweiler.
I wanted to get brain surgery.
I changed my mind.
How did the blind girl get a date?
She said it was love at first sight.
My wife purely hates me for me having sex with our daughter.
It's not my fault I couldn't wait to get out of the abortion clinic!
How are urinals made?
They get installed.