Did your dad ever tell you he was going to get milk... But then never came back lol? 😅
Get Jokes
Little Johnny was living with his grandpa during the summer. Well, grandpa had a beer, and Johnny said, "Grandpa, let me get a sip of that." Grandpa said, "Well, lil Johnny, does your d**k reach your a**?" And lil Johnny said, "Well no sir." And grandpa said, then no, you can't.
Later that day, papaw (grandpa) had a cigar, and Johnny said let me get a hit of that, and papaw asked, "Well, Johnny, does your d**k reach your a**?" And Johnny said no again. Then papaw was shooting his gun, and Johnny asked if he could shoot it, and grandpa asked Johnny if his d**k reached his a**, and Johnny said no.
Well, after supper, Johnny's grandma made Johnny some ice cream (the most amazing bowl of ice cream EVER), and grandpa said, "Johnny, let me get a bit of that ice cream," and Johnny asked papaw, "Well, papaw, does your d**k reach your a**?" And papaw said, "Well, Johnny, as a matter of a fact, it does," and Johnny said, "Good, now go f**k yourself because you ain't getting none of my ice cream!"
my grandfather cant a woman's taco anymore cause his balls fell off from getting to many tacos
"History's repeating itself. WWIII is coming, and the second Russia nukes the U.S., they're all getting fucked."
Do emos get jealous when their phone dies?
Dark jokes are just like food.
Not everyone gets it.
There were 3 blonde scientists...wait that’s not the joke. The first one said “we are going to pilot the first unmanned spacecraft to land on the sun.”
The second one said “but we can’t do that - if we get within 5 feet of the sun we’ll freeze to death!”
The third blonde says “so we go at night.”
Imagine getting rickrolled. Oh, I forgot, you already got rickrolled yesterday.
Why did the toilet paper get to the bottom of the hill?
Because he went down the drain! - it's a bad joke, lmao.
Why are dead baby jokes always funny?
They never get old.
Do you know why dead baby jokes are always funny?
They never get old.
You masturbate...
AAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
You won't get any Squirtle and Bulbasaur pets.
If you ever become depressed, try drinking a gallon of water before going to sleep... That’ll give you a reason to get up in the morning.
If you ever become depressed, try drinking a gallon of water before going to sleep... That'll give you a reason to get up in the morning.
How do you get an orphan to go to sleep?
Tell them their parents are waiting when they wake up.
Poor kids in American schools, they want books, but all they get are magazines.
What's the difference between property and women? At least property still retains some value after getting wrecked.
Yo mama so fat, she had to get baptized in the ocean.
What do you call a protest that gets crowded?
Human trafficking.
Easy way to get away from rape is to become the rapist. All women need to carry a 12-inch dildo and a gun!
