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What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?
The apple gets picked.
How it be when the new guy takes too long...
Hay Danny, it's me Johnny.
Johnny: Boss says to kill the guy in red. Point the gun at his head.
Danny: Ok, target locked. 3... 2... 1... bang.
Johnny: Danny, hope you did not get the man in red.
Danny: OH MY BRO FOR REALL.
A fat man coming in the store.
Waiter: Oh god, not again :|
Fat man: Hi, I would like three fries and 19 burgers.
Waiter: Sorry sir, you will get the owner's store out of stock on food. Can I get you a salad instead?
Fat man: Oh sorry, but I'm the owner, and I have a lot of stocks. For the record, you should get yourself my order. You're skinny af, girl. You trying to be a stick or something?
Why do gay people get bad grades?
Because they don't get straight A's.
Orphan: Throws a boomerang.
Boomerang: Comes back with his father.
Father: Goes to get milk.
How to protect your nuts from being hit: Just get hard.
Do you know why orphans can't get married? Because they will never get their parents' blessing.
What's the difference between apples and orphans?
An apple gets picked.
How can you get 3 homos to sit on one barstool?
Turn it upside down.
What's the difference between when I opened the window in a car wash and when Kawhi Leonard did it? At least my dad didn't get shot in the eye.
I hope every time you watch YouTube, you get 30 second unskippable ads!
Why do orphans never get 5 stars in GTA 5? Because they are not wanted!
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan? The apple gets picked.
When you get mad, just punch an orphan. Who are they going to tell? Their mom?
You get hit by a wave, but you don't get wet. Why?
You were hit by a shockwave!
Why do candles like birthdays?
Because they can get lit!
What's the difference between an orphan and a vegetable?
The vegetable gets picked.
My mom is telling me to get off Friday Night Funkin' or she will slam my head against the keyboard: weherhrqqkh[qokqho[krq3[t4i2-4q43q343q44334q43.
How did the computer hackers get away from the scene of the crime?
I think they just hacked the "chrime."
Have you heard of the new sequel to "The Exorcist"?
A woman hires the devil to get a priest out of her son.