Future jokes

Attention, everyone: I will be leaving this website. Thank you everybody who has been nice to me. Maybe I’ll come back in the future, but for now: Goodbye.

Teacher: What do you want when you grow up?

That depressed kid in class: Dead.

Look at the bright side!

The worst is behind us.

Today is a gift. That’s why we call it the present.

1950: In the future there will be flying cars.

2018: Pewdiepie shuts down Shane Dawson.

What is an orphan's favorite day?

Tomorrow: that is when the sun will come out.

What's the difference between you and me?

I have a plan for this new year.

So long, suckers. Keep scrolling.

Someday you'll go far.

Me in 2078 when the COVID-19 delta alpha theta beta cya layta alligayta nlgga chungus sussy deef clussy sussy bussy cunnybrap variant comes out and I need to stay in lockdown for another 2 years with my new mandated virus stopper buttplug 9000.

You will never have a girlfriend.

I found the best GoFundMe: https://www.gofundme.com/f/help-get-the-time-machine.

Why did the rapper bring a telescope to the studio?

To see his FUTURE in the STARS.

Wordle be like (pt3)

Any future Wordle jokes I'll just put into one mega comp.

STUCK 💛🩶🩶🩶💛

FOLKS 🩶🩶🩶💛💚

MAKES 🩶🩶💚💚💚

YIKES 💛🩶💚💚💚

I traveled through time to get my dad back.

I failed because I was 1e21 years off.

"Back To The Future"-Doc: You can time travel to anytime in HISTORY, Marty, but NEVER go to the year 2021.....

What is always in front of you but can’t be seen?

Answer: The future.

Who knows? Maybe the end of the world will be made in China too.

My girlfriend told me that she wonders what our kids will look like.

No, they will be wondering what I look like.

Global warming will kill every single person on this planet.

It's a good thing I'm married.

What are they going to say about Tim Gunn in 20 years?

He kicked the bucket.