My friend's dad went to jail. He's just surprised because he can finally find him.
I asked my friend what happened to him? His balance shifted.
The other day I went to a museum, my friend and I went to the holocaust section and he got choked up when he saw the Anne Frank picture. I asked him. Why are you sad it’s just an Ash tray
I took my friend skydiving ones and he jumped out of the plane without a parachute then I remembered he was emo
I can’t watch anime anymore when my friends grandpa is in the house
He hasn’t heard a Japanese person scream since the war
Me to friend: I'm homeschooled Friend: if I was homeschooled I'd kms Me: oh, I already tried that.
Friend 1: *turns off lights* Friend 2: *is there with us* Me: Woah! Where did friend 2 go?!
My lesbian friends bought me a nice watch for my birthday. I think they got confused when I said "I wanna watch"
An African man visits his friend in the US
“I just flew in yesterday” the African man says “And boy are my arms tired!”
“You know, that’s kind of an old joke here in America” replied his friend.
“Joke?” The African man said. “I’ve been holding my hands in the air yelling ‘don’t shoot’ ever since I got to this damn country”.
I was laughing my ass off when the 12 year old child realized the door to my basement was unlocked, and he didn't need to cannibalize his two friends in a desperate attempt for survival 🤣🤣🤣
A friend of mine loves to play Roulette, so I decided to introduce him to Russian Roulette. It blew his mind.