Friend jokes
My boyfriend and I were playing baseball last night with some of our friends. Halfway through the game we took a break and he asked me to hold his balls for him whilst he went to the toilet.
All our friends were shocked when I went into the boys' bathroom with him.
To anyone who wants to be my friend:
Hello.
Does anyone wanna be my friend? Please if ya' do reply to my: "Hello." In the chat. Tysm. Have a greaat day!
Alex <3
During school today, a girl gave my friend her number. When I saw it, it was the principal's number.
There has to be someone that hates watersharky. He curses at you if you say one thing about his friends or him. He just is mean and needs to leave.
Me: I have an arrow in my head.
My friend: What's the point of that?
Me: Of the arrow?
Friend: No!
Me: Probably the flint.
My friend said, "Let's have a sleepover."
Little did I know it was just at prison.
"What do you do with your free time?"
"I stalk."
"Really? I enjoy walks in the park, going to the movies, and hanging out with friends."
"I know."
You can pick your friends and you can pick your 🤥 nose, but you can't pick your friends' noses 👃 👃 👃 👃 👃 👃 👃.
Does it 🚲 🚲 🚲 cycle now?
Friend: Your life is a joke.
Me: No, jokes have meaning.
My sister's friends are hilarious, like seriously, haha.
My Dearest Friend--C'mon, RickRoll ;)
Mom: Hey you! What are you doing?!
Me: Nothing, why?
Mom: You're supposed to do your ______.
Me that/every night: *sob*
Friends: Are you okay?
Me: Yeah, fine.
Me in head: Or maybe I'm not okay...
My friend's mom died, and he also died in a crash.
If you had a friend like me, would you kill me?
Why do asscheeks make great friends?
They always stick together!
"Yo, Gabriella, any idea where our other friends are?"
I asked my friend what happened to him?
His balance shifted.
Your hairline goes so far back, your mom is scared you're not going to make friends.
I had a friend named Wemiyoe... We call him "we me you."
My friend: Yo stupid.
Me: Is that right, and what exactly have you done in your lifetime that makes you Einstein?
My friend: *rolls eyes and says whatever.*
Me: Keep on rolling them, you might find your brain in there.