Friend jokes

So my friend died. I was at her casket. I said I'll see you on the other side, so I went to the other side of the casket.

F is for friends who don't talk to you.

U is for Ur alone.

N is for never having any plans at all, all you do is sit at home.

Why didn't the orphan play video games with his friends?

Because his parents wouldn't let him.

My friend said, "Where is the trash?" I said, "Look in the mirror, there is the trash."

A kid milks a cow and goes to school and tells his friends, "I milked a cow, and it took awhile for it to warm up." His brother came over and said, "We don't have cows, we have bulls."

Hey woah man, and Alya how are you guys? Oh and hbu jk master? How is life right now? Is it hard? You wanna talk?

Q. What do you say when your friend has an abortion?

A. May your baby rest in pieces.

DEPRESSION SPEEDRUN starter-kit:

* Parental issues * Money problems * Genetic likeliness * Horrible friends * Annoying neighbors/classmates * School * Being alive * Actually being a good person for once * Giving a f#ck * War-ridden area * All future options kinda suck

My friend called me fat, so I challenged him to a running race.

My emo friend got jealous when my phone died.

Hi, people. I really need a friend. Can someone please be my friend? Say in comments if you will.

"-JuicyFruitSnacks- A whole lot of pepper and a whole lot of salt. If I blame it on my friends, it won't be my fault."

-Mully- This is my mom left!!

There has to be someone that hates watersharky. He curses at you if you say one thing about his friends or him. He just is mean and needs to leave.

Riley....I...I think I wanna be more than friends.

Me: What do you call an orphan?

Friend: Homeless.

My teacher asks all of us in class, "What is your favorite thing in the world?"

Josh: Cookies.

Jacob: My parents.

Erika: My Friends!

Brody: Lamborghinis.

Me: Pulling over in a car in the middle of nowhere at night with my girlfriend and getting in the back seat where the magic happens... ;-)

My Teacher: Ok, everyone that was all good...WAIT A DANG SECOND!

*Everyone Looks at Me With A Weird Face....

Why does Aaron have no friends? Because his spine is weird and he is fat.

Orphan: Wanna have a sleepover?

Friend: But you're an orphan.

Orphan: Just wanted a place to sleep tonight!

What does the ocean do to its friends? It waves. (*Sorry, I wasn’t making any jokes for a while. I was getting sick of this thing.*)

I watched a movie with a lot of ketchup on the ground.

I don't know why my friends look disgusted.