Best Friend

Best Friend Jokes

What's a similarity between your best friend and a tree? They both fall over when you hit them with an axe.


To my best friend, my brother is like a spider. She chose to kill him straight away. That's why she is my friend, after all! :D


My best friend looked at my arms and said “stop sh it’s bad” then turns right around and says “you look like a tiger”

so from here on out i am now Finn the self harming tiger

19. It’s important to establish a good vocabulary. If I had known the difference between the words “antidote” and “anecdote,” one of my best friends would still be alive.

A man find out his wife is cheating on him with his best friend, so he hires a hitman to shoot his wife in the head, and his friend in the balls. The hitman charges $100 per bullet. The man agrees. Later, they set up, and the hitman looks through the scope and says “I can save you $100”

Jack and Jill

went up the hill

so Jack could lick Jill’s candy

but Jack had a shock

with a mouth full of cock

cause Jill’s real name was Randy

With a tight cheeked fanny

and shlong expandy

Jack’s face turned uncanny

Off he ranny

to tell granny

his best friend was a tranny

I went to a sleepover at my best friend's house. He lives with his grandpa and little brother, his mom and dad. His little brother likes to run around the house naked sometimes. I cant help but notice his grandpa always looks up when he does.

A cock really has a sad life, he’s hairs a mess his neighbors an areshole his best friend is a cunt.

A dick has a sad life. His hair's a mess, his family is nuts, his neighbor's an asshole, his best friend's a pussy and his owner beats him.