Foot jokes
Yo mama so fat that she broke the scale when she put one foot on it.
"Discuss the synopsis of this poem: My Friend Billy Has A Ten-Foot Willy."
Why did the ball person go to the doctor?
He was kicked in the balls.
Why are women’s feet so small?
So they can stand closer to the sink.
Why did my foot cross the road?
Because your ass was on the other side.
Why do women have small feet?
So they can stand closer to the sink.
An Ob-Gyn asks a lady to put her feet up on the stirrups.
Doctor: My God, you have the biggest vagina I’ve ever seen!
Woman: You don’t have to say that twice.
Doctor: I didn’t.
Why did I trip over your foot?
Because you were so short I couldn’t see you!
I don't have a carbon footprint; I just drive everywhere.
Step on your small sister's foot, she will always open her mouth like a dustbin.
Landing on its feet won't help a cat in China...
What did Jesus say when they removed the nails from his hands?
"Feet! Feet!"
Me: How does this thing work?
ForTnite kid: Oh, you don’t know how to use a pistol? Look, I’ll show you.
ForTnitekid: *shoots foot*
Me: That wasn’t a very good demonstration.
A father tells his 10-year-old son...
"Sprinkle a pinch of gunpowder on your cereal every morning and you will have a very long life."
His son followed his father's advice every morning without missing a day until he died at the age of 186, leaving behind 28 children, 67 grandchildren, 148 great-grandchildren, and a 7-foot crater where the crematory used to be.
What has 5 legs, 3 arms, and 2 feet?
The finish line at the Boston Marathon.
What is 3 feet tall and sits at the bottom of children's beds?
A: Garry Glitter's boots.
A friend texts to another:
"Hey." They reply, "What's up?"
The first friend then replies with a simple answer, "The sky!" But the other friend intervenes and says, "No, it's the ceiling!"
To then the first friend finishes the greeting with, "Unless you're homeless or six feet under."
Why do you put a baby in a blender feet first?
So you can see the look on its face as you climax.
What’s the best part about putting a baby in a blender feet first?
Watching their expression change.
Why are all women's feet small? So they can stand closer to the stove.