Food jokes
How did the cheetah greet other animals?
Cheetah: "Nice to eat you."
What do you call a guy in a wheelchair smoking weed?
A baked potato.
How did the flight attendant want their burger?
Just plane!
Why's it called a Caesar Salad?
'Cause Caesar ruled the romaines.
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πΈπΈ πΈπΈ πΈπΈ πΈ πΈ π· π· π· π· π· π· π·π₯΄ π₯΄ π₯΄ π₯΄ π₯΄ π₯΄ π₯΄ π₯΄ π₯΄ π₯΄ π₯΄ π₯΄ π₯΄ π₯΄ π₯΄ π₯΄ π₯΄ π₯΄ π₯΄ π₯΄
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Why did the pope drink horse piss? Because a priest asked him what would he do for a Klondike bar? π€ͺ π
Memes
How much of a homophobic heterosexual man are you?
I'm a heterosexual man that is so homophobic I won't suck a big dick that has ketchup on it.
Why don't vegetarians moan during sex?
Because they don't want to admit that meat makes them happy.
A guy walks into a butcher's shop and says, "Sir, are you a gambling man?"
The butcher says, "Why yes, as a matter of fact, I am."
"Then I'll bet you $25 you can't reach up and touch that meat hanging over your head right there."
The butcher thinks for a moment and says, "I'm sorry, I won't take that bet."
The guy says, "But I thought you said you were a gambling man."
"I am. But the steaks are too high."
The Breakfast Couples: (Bacon) - Don't go bacon my heart.
(Egg) - I couldn't if I fried.
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef......haha.....no one likes my jokes.
The black nurse tells me she has been a vegan for 29 years. The father sitting next to me asks, "So you don't miss fried chicken?"
What do you call a herd of cows masturbating?
Beef strokin' off.
Where were the first French Fries π made?
In Greece.
A girl asked, "Can I have some nuts too?"
Boy: "Sure, what ones ;)"
What do oranges sweat?
Orange juice. ππβ€οΈ
Why did the octopus cross the road?
'Cause he was on the same side as a sushi restaurant.
Why did the crumb cake isolate himself? He had a crumbling social life.
What do world hunger and a Mercedes have in common?
Princess Diana couldn't stop both of them.
Kids are like a box of chocolates, they taste so good and you never know what you are going to get.
"I'm sorry," the doctor says, "you have a rare and very contagious disease. We must quarantine you, and you'll only be fed cheese and bologna."
"Will that cure me?" the patient asks.
"Well, no," the doctor replies, "but it's the only food that will fit under the door."