Food jokes

"I'm sorry," the doctor says, "you have a rare and very contagious disease. We must quarantine you, and you'll only be fed cheese and bologna."

"Will that cure me?" the patient asks.

"Well, no," the doctor replies, "but it's the only food that will fit under the door."

I asked my friend what their serial number was... He said "Cheerios."

What does a Catholic Priest and a commercial from the 80s have in common? They both ask people, "Where's the meat?"

More about Quinn: He loves Robin. He loves his tight ass. He licks up all his shit after Taco Bell.

What's an orphan's favorite flower?

Self-raising flour.

Your legs are just like Oreos! I wanna split the ends and eat what's in between.

Why do lions 🦁 go to SUBWAY 🥪?

Because they like to EAT FLESH.

What do you call a bunch of Mexicans running down a hill?

Taco Bell going out of business.

What did Hitler get for his 6th birthday?

A Kewpie burger and an Easy-Bake Oven.

What flavor of pizza did the Twin Towers order?...

Plane.

What did the man say to the woman? "Make me a sandwich."

What's green and sings?

Elvis Parsley!

What can Michael Jackson eat in his coffin?

Nothing, only brown bread, what they call it! 😂😂😂

Recently I visited a restaurant in Crotone. When I was done eating, I told the waitress I was “Penaldo” with my food. She instantly knew that I was finished with my food.

What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?

An apple gets picked.

What do a stripper and a coconut have in common? They both have a creamy center.

What is the difference between an apple and an orphan? The apple gets picked.

Why didn't the cows eat the lemon grass?

It made sour milk.

I'm not a chef, but boy, are these days getting harder and harder to get through.

What’s the difference between an apple and an orphan?

One of them gets picked.