What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground Beef.
Food Jokes
🧀: C’mon tomato!
🍅: I’m trying to ketchup.
🧀: You’re a mile away.
🍅: I am a tomato! It’s not that easy for me to ketchup.
What's a cannibal's favorite dessert?
Lady fingers.
Why were the Twin Towers upset? They ordered Domino's but got jets.
Friend 1: What's your favorite drink or food?
Friend 2: Pizza.
Friend 3: Donuts.
Friend 4: I don't eat food but I do drink bleach.
Friend 1: (calling the suicide hotline)
Friend 2: (Calling the parents)
What's a skeleton's favorite food?
Spare ribs.
Yo mama so stupid, she thought Dunkin' Donuts was a basketball team.
Mary Poppins went to a restaurant and ordered cheese, eggs, and cauliflower. When she left, she had written something in the complaint box: "Super cauliflower, eggs, but cheese was quite atrocious." (Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious)
Woman: What’s a good comeback for my sexist husband when he tells me to go make him a sandwich?
Husband: I know! How about you COMEBACK with a goddamn sandwich?
What do you call a fruit that argues against the position it supports?
The Devil's advocado.
Cannibal eats missionary, gets a taste for religion.
Me (an adult) with my girl going to a nice restaurant, I asked the waiter, "People under 12 eat free, right?" The waiter confirmed that yes, people under 12 eat free, then my girlfriend said, "But I'm 13."
What country do French Fries come from? Grease.
I'd like to relish the fact that you've mustered up the courage to ketchup to my level.
Why did little Timmy dip the cookie in water?
"Because his dad never brought the milk."
What do tomatoes 🍅 learn to do in a race?
Ketchup!
What's the difference between McDonald's and a priest?
nothing... they both stick their meat in ten-year-old buns.
Roses are red, violets are black, your mum's so fat she sold her son for 10 Big Macs.
Two nuts were chasing each other. One said to the other, "I'm-a cashew!"
What’s the best way to get a baby out of a blender? Tortilla Chips.
