Food jokes

A cow is an earthquake, it's a milkshake.

Every time someone calls me fat, I get so depressed I cut myself... a piece of cake.

What’s the difference between broccoli and little girls?

I don’t like the taste of broccoli.

What’s the difference between an orphan and an apple? An apple gets picked.

Why can't Asians play Baseball?

Because they ate the bat.

What type of cookie has an orphan never had? Home made cookies ;)

What is a cannibal's favorite type of pizza?

Domi-nose.

Michael Jackson had an allergic reaction after eating 12-year-old nuts.

I like my women the way I like my sandwiches... A little meat between their buns.

How do you get a fat kid to lose weight?

You pay the ice cream man to keep on driving. IDK.

If I had 10 dino nuggies and Jamal tried to take one, I would have ten dino nuggies and Jamal's head.

Why do the orphans love going to the bakery down the street so much? Because their cookies are homemade.

Mother: How is my little cookie doing?

Doctor: Your cookie is feeling crummy right now.

Mother: Really?

Doctor: But don’t worry. Things are about to get batter.

Mother: 😁♥️🍪

What's wrong with airline food...! They're not black, and they're not people. hahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahhahahahXD!!!!!!!!! You're welcome?

English: It's the story of two potatoes, one gets mashed and the other screams “Oh mash!”

French: C’est l’histoire de deux pommes de terre. Une d’elles se fait écraser et l’autre s’écrie “Oh purée!”

Pizza Hut.

what kind of shoes are made of banana peels? slippers.

So, I took a poop outside. When I was done, I wiped and got it on my finger. After that, I had Nutella, and I thought the poop on my hand was Nutella, and I licked it. I said, "Daddy chill, what in the heck is this crap?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

If you eat a clock, then does that mean you’ve consumed time?

You couldn't spit out a good sentence, even if you ate a bowl of alphabet soup.