Food jokes
What’s the difference between an orphan and an apple? An apple gets picked.
Why can't Asians play Baseball?
Because they ate the bat.
Michael Jackson had an allergic reaction after eating 12-year-old nuts.
Why did Jeffery Dahmer not eat old people?
He does not like roasted vegetables.
What type of cookie has an orphan never had? Home made cookies ;)
Memes
How do you get a fat kid to lose weight?
You pay the ice cream man to keep on driving. IDK.
If I had 10 dino nuggies and Jamal tried to take one, I would have ten dino nuggies and Jamal's head.
Why do the orphans love going to the bakery down the street so much? Because their cookies are homemade.
Pizza Hut.
what kind of shoes are made of banana peels? slippers.
English: It's the story of two potatoes, one gets mashed and the other screams “Oh mash!”
French: C’est l’histoire de deux pommes de terre. Une d’elles se fait écraser et l’autre s’écrie “Oh purée!”
Two nuts were walking down the street, and one was a-salted!
So, I took a poop outside. When I was done, I wiped and got it on my finger. After that, I had Nutella, and I thought the poop on my hand was Nutella, and I licked it. I said, "Daddy chill, what in the heck is this crap?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
You couldn't spit out a good sentence, even if you ate a bowl of alphabet soup.
How are peppers 🌶 so nosey?
They get jalapeño business.
Why did the boy put the potatoes 🥔 on the kitchen floor?
He wanted to mash potatoes!
I look at my girlfriend’s ass like a homeless man looks at a trash can.
Like it’s my next meal.
What’s another term for a lesbian?
A vagetarian.
What do pretzels and a corrupt government have in common?
They are both twisted.
Why are the Chinese bad at baseball?
Because they ate all the bats.