Julius Caesar jokes

How do you think Julius Caesar killed his enemies?..

With a pair of Caesars! 😂😂👌

Julius Caesar is Roman? More like romaine (salad), and to make the best salad, you stab it 23 times until the Caesar salad, romaine salad, is fresh.

You telling me Julius Caesar, who has been dead for well over 50 years, made this salad?

The most famous line from Shakespeare’s play Julius Caesar is “Et tu, Brute?” Why can’t he just speak plain English?

Julius Caesar (salad) made easy.

"Julius Caesar" isneezer

Julius Caesar walks into a bar and orders a Martinus.

The bartender asks, "Don't you mean Martini?"

Julius Caesar says, "No, I only want one."

What is Julius Caesar’s favorite food?

Roman noodles.

How do you make any salad into a caesar salad?

Stab it twenty-three times.

Caesar went to the future only to see how the Romans forgot Julius Caesar but only made a salad... I think it would have been better if Caesar stayed dead.

You travel to the past into the era where Julius Caesar is still alive. He thinks you may be from the future to bring him good news. He asks you, "How do I die?"

You reply with: "Surrounded by friends."

Julius's wife always stands behind him. Therefore, whenever he looks in the mirror, he sees her (Caesar).

Cesar: What was that good salad called?

Servant: Ceaser, Cesar.

Cesar: Okay, what's going to be the weather like?

Servant: Hail, Cesar.

Cesar: Yes, I know "Hail Cesar," but I need to know what the weather's like!

Servant: Well, it's hail, Cesar.

Cesar: AHHHHH! Send him to the DUNGEONS! NOW!

Julius Caesar & Tork Poettschke at the doctor's office:

"The doctor has now sent me the bill."

"Make him aware of his duty of confidentiality!"

Which Roman emperor was a mouse? Julius Cheeser!