Food jokes
What do you call a pig who knows how to use a knife? A pork chop.
How can you tell if a pig is hot? It's bacon.
Inflation is so bad, McDonald’s is selling the 1/4 ouncer.
What’s the difference between a baby and a baked potato?
About 140 calories.
It took me years to figure out the Oreos served in Lunchables are knock offs. On the cover it says “Chocolate Crème Cookies.” I’ve believed this lie for as long as I can remember. Unless they were real back then? I don’t even know at this point. They sure as hell aren’t real now!
How do mice floss their teeth? With string cheese.
How do you cook an alligator? With a croc-pot.
Your mom's so small that she hang glided on a Dorito!
1 like = 1 fetus donated to the soup kitchen.
Why did the rapper open a bakery?
To make some DOUGH on the side.
How does a rapper like his eggs?
Hard-boiled, to match his beats!
What’s a booty’s favorite type of bread?
Buns.
What's the difference between a cop and bacon?
Bacon is full of fat and makes you feel good. A cop is full of shit and will make you feel their hot steamy cock as they ram it up your ass with some justice sprinkled on top.
Why don't rappers ever become chefs?
Because they can't stop droppin' the beet!
What do you call a rapper who can’t rap?
A wrapper with no FILLING.
How do you know a rapper is ready to cook?
He drops the beet.
I'm holding an African themed party tomorrow. There is no food, and the drinks are 10 miles away!
Why were the Twin Towers mad? They wanted pepperoni, but instead, they got plane.
Why did the human eat cereal in the bathroom?
So he could querk.
I’ve seen more life in a bowl of WEEK-OLD GUACAMOLE than in BLESSEDBRIAN’S jokes.