Food jokes
What’s the difference between KFC and a woman on her period?
One’s finger-licking good and the other is just a fast food restaurant.
Jeffrey Dahmer was craving Five Guys before it became a restaurant!
How does an orange 🍊 go into a crowded restaurant?
By squeezing his way in.
Why do orphans love chips? They love the family-sized ones, too!
What do you call a cupcake with no frosting? A frosting cupcake.
Did you know an apple and an orphan are different.
An apple gets picked.
"Hey, man, do you have any Ben and Jerry's?"
"Yeah, I have two of them, fresh and preserved in the freezer."
"I meant the ice cream, bro..."
What kind of book does cheese read at a church?
The Hole-y Bible.
Hey, what’s your favorite type of tomato? Mine is sun-dried tomato.
Get it? "Sun-dried" like "son died."
Entered what I ate today into my new fitness app, and it just sent an ambulance to my house.
Today, I saw my friend go crazy eating her ham sandwich. When she went to the bathroom, I checked inside her ham sandwich, and there were fresh drugs.
What's an emo's favorite food?
Shot gun ammo.
Yo mama's so stupid, she got locked in the grocery store and starved to death.
Why are the Twin Towers mad?
They are like pepperoni and cheese as a plane.
What do you call Indian dhal that is delicious?
Well, that is DHALicious!
Yo mama so stupid, she stared at a bottle of orange juice for 12 hours because it said "concentrate."
Mom: Please eat, baby!
Baby: No!
Mom: Here comes the airplane!
Son: What's for dinner tonight?
Mom: Steak!
Son: Mom, you know I only eat veggies, so what's for me?
Mom: HUNGER!
A panda walks into a restaurant, orders some food, and eats it. Once he was done, he shoots the waiter, then leaves.
Police and detectives arrive at the scene. They ask the waiter, "Who did this to you? What happened?"
The waiter replies, "A panda, eats, shoots, and leaves."
What’s the Twin Towers' favorite kind of pizza?
A: Plain.