Food jokes
Three boy chihuahua were hot about this girl chihuahua. She tells them, "I will date whichever one of you can use liver and cheese in the same sentence."
First dog says, "I love cheese, but liver is bland."
She replies, "Really original."
Next dog, "I love liver, but cheese makes me constipated."
She replies, "Ew, gross."
Third dog steps up, "Man, liver alone cheese mine."
Winner dog 3.
How do you fit a baby in a bowl? ... A blender... and how do you get it out?
Tortilla chips.
What’s the difference between cereal and a baby?
I personally think cereal is not nutritious.
Why are mice bad singers?
They are very cheesy.
What’s the hardest part of a vegetable to eat?
The wheelchair.
Two sticks of butter walk into a butter bar. One says to the other, "Aren't you going to introduce me to your friends?" He replies, "Sure, dis my butter from another utter."
I would kill for something to eat--the cannibal.
Why did the tamale go to the hospital?
because estava malito :)
What’s the difference between a bird and a human?
“We don’t eat with our peckers.”
Two cannibals have just captured a man and are about to eat him, so they cook him and lay him on a table. The first cannibal says, "You start at the bottom, I start at the top," so they both chow down.
About half an hour later, the second cannibal says, "I'm having a ball!" Then the first cannibal says, "Then you're eating too fast!"
Where do you take your pig to karate?
The pork chop class!
How do you eat a meat?
You steak it in your mouth.
What's green and smells like bacon?
Kermit the frog's finger.
What do you call a pig who knows karate?
A pork chop.
What did the skeleton say after dinner?
Bon appétit!
What’s the difference between a baby and a beet?
Beets stain your teeth.
What did one alligator say to the other alligator?
"Let’s go for an all-in-one buffet!"
What do you call a skinny black dick? A Tootsie Roll.
This guy walked into a pizzeria and ordered a water. The owner called him an idiot.
His girlfriend walked in and ordered a pineapple pizza.
The guy left her, and the owner made her leave.
Broccoli is like anal sex.
If you're forced to have it as a child, you probably won't like it as an adult.