Food jokes
My kitchen was rearranged today. The tables have turned, and the steaks are higher.
Why is the most popular food at a baseball stadium pancakes? Because everybody likes a good batter!
What goes in hard but comes out soft?
Gum.
The son margarine shows his father his test that he failed.
Father: Son, you can do butter!
Is your body from McDonald's, because I'm loving it?
If you have 20 apples and you ate 2, how many do you have left?
0 because you have 20 and take away 2, you have 0 left.
What does Stephen Hawking eat?
Is it weird that a milk carton has a date, and I don’t?
What’s white and crunchy and swings through trees?
A meringue-atang.
What is Stephen Hawking's favorite snack?
Vegetables.
What's the difference between a baby and a Dorito?
One is a tasty snack, the other is a Dorito.
What's the difference between onions and babies?
I cry when I cut onions.
"I only eat food on the right of my plate."
"Are you good at eating?"
"I'm alright at eating."
What do you call an infant with no legs?
Ground beef.
While fucking a hot auntie, pressing tightly her boobs and fondling, He: What do you feed your babies? She: Milk and orange juice. He: Wow, which side is orange juice? 😋
I named my refrigerator Oicurmt, because every time I look in, I say, "O I C, U R MT."
Kids, next time you have school dinners, make sure you have something you actually like so you don't have to shove all your food over to one side of the plate to make it look like you've eaten more than you actually have.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Banana.
Banana who?
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Banana.
Banana who?
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Orange.
Orange who?
Orange you glad I did not say banana? Ha ha!
What did the cookie say to the milk?
What’s up duud?
What did the Indian cheese say to the other cheese?
"Tu cheese badi hai mast mast!"