What did the one-handed man have for breakfast this morning?
Finger food.
Food Jokes
Have you ever tried eating a clock? It's really time-consuming, especially if you go for seconds.
Why did the Oreo go to the dentist?
🎉🎇🎊🎆🎈
At least Africans don't have to worry about food critics.
What's the difference between sand and food? Africans have plenty of sand.
Catholic men say eating broccoli is like anal sex.
If you’re forced to have it as a child, you probably won’t like it as an adult.
Have you ever eaten a clock before? I heard it’s very time consuming.
Why did the turkey suck my bacon? Because it wanted cum in its mouth.
Do you like fish sticks?
If you do, you're a gay fish.
What do you call an epileptic midget that works at Little Caesars?
Little Seizures.
When I become a parent, I’m gonna regurgitate my food to feed my children.
It’ll give me an excuse to make out with my daughter.
Din mor ligner en banan. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
What did Harry Houdini say when he did his famous vanishing act at a sushi place?
"Now sashimi, now you don't!"
What do you say when you see a pig making bread?
He's bacon.
What did one angry cow say to another?
We got some beef.
What’s the difference between fruit and dead babies?
I don’t put fruit in a blender.
The bakery where I work is being robbed. I said to the people, "I am calling the police." Then I realized they did not come for the money; they came for the bread. Huh, go figure!
What does a baby banana call her mum? Na na, get it? Instead of ma ma.
Fruit is like life. You slowly eat it away as it slowly also begins to rot like everyone I’ve known.
It turns out a major new study recently found that humans eat more bananas than monkeys.
It’s true. I can’t remember the last time I ate a monkey.
