Food jokes
The snack that smiles back: Ball sack.
If you scanned my thigh, it would show up as a package of Oreos on the screen.
Person 1: "I love KFC."
Person 2: "Yeah, me too!"
Person 1: "How many have you gotten?"
Person 2: "How am I supposed to remember how many buckets of chicken I have ordered!?"
Person 1: "Chicken? What chicken? What do you think KFC stands for?"
Person 2: "Kentucky Fried Chicken?"
Person 1: "What? I thought it meant kidnapping foster children."
Person 2: "BLOODY WHATT??"
Why do bees have sticky hair?
Because they use a honeycomb.
What stresses a baby strawberry out?
When its mom is in a jam.
Riddle me this, Batman, what's long, round, and has cum in the middle?
Batman: A dick.
Riddler: NO NO NOOO! It's a cucumber!
What's the difference between jelly and jam? You can't jelly a clown into the tiny car.
Want to know how you make any salad into a Caesar salad?
Stab it twenty-three times.
New business idea: let's put a KFC in Africa and a watermelon shop.
What’s the difference between a baby and a baked potato?
About 140 calories.
What’s the difference between a fetus and a jar of pickles?
The pickles aren’t as tasty in a jar.
What does an 80-year-old woman taste like?
Depends.
"What did the mama tomato say to the baby tomato? Catch up!"
Why did the baby strawberry cry? Because his mom was in a jam!
Why did the cookie cry?
Because its mom was a wafer too long!
There's nothing quite like being told I'm wrong by someone who depends on me for food, clothing, and shelter.
Guys, you need to ketchup with the time.
Inflation is so bad, McDonald’s is selling the 1/4 ouncer.
How do you disappoint people in Africa?
Send a message saying that you’re going to send trucks full of food, water, and clothing.
But don’t follow through and send the trucks empty.
How do you cook an alligator? With a croc-pot.