Food

Food jokes

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Friend

  • My friend talking to fat boi: "I can order you at McDonald's: Double Big Mac, triple quarter pounder cheeseburger."

    Elephant

  • Why do elephants paint their toes red, blue, green, orange, brown, and yellow?

    So they can hide in a bag of M&Ms.

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    Burger

  • Why did your friend eat the burger?

    Because he wanted to murder all burgers and was starting with this one!

    Not really. He was just hungry.

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    Son

  • My son asked me, “What is angel cake made of?”

    I reply by listing the ingredients in Mr. Kipling angel cakes. Then he shouts “STOP!” I stop as I reach food colorings. He slowly crawls towards me and says in a whisper, “Well, in my angel cake, I put angels in them.”

    I freaked out about this, so I calmed down and asked who did you put in this angel cake. He said, “Grandma, the one who died last Saturday.”

    Clock

  • So I thought about trying to eat a clock one day.

    After about 13 tries, I realized this was very time consuming.

    Cheese

  • What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Nacho cheese. Okay, I can't do this anymore.