Food jokes
Cheese, gimme cheese!
(inspired by a friend)
What’s the difference between orphans and apples?
Apples get picked.
What do you call a gay man with a thicc ass?
Fruit cake.
Yo mamma so poor that when we went on a date, she took off her shoe laces and said "spaghetti."
20 likes by just cheese.
Q: What's the difference between an abortion clinic and Uber Eats?
A: The abortion clinic doesn't deliver.
There was a person inside who needed help from the police, but the police changed their number, so he ordered a party with pizzas from 2 airplanes, but the pilots were stupid, so they put people instead of pizzas, and one landed on the 93rd floor and the 94th floor, literally.
Takis.
Blue Takis?
Did you know that McDonald's made a Michael Jackson burger? It’s a 50-year-old piece of meat in a 12-year-old bun.
If you feel a lump in your rice, you fucked up.
If you feel a lump in your skin, you have cancer.
What is the difference between an orphan and an apple?
What is the difference between apples and orphans?
Apples actually get picked.
An orphan is at a barbecue and is getting food. A man asks him if he wants steak or phan I ment ham.
Omnom.
What’s the difference between an onion and a viola?
No one cries when they cut up the viola.
Two muffins are in an oven.
One says, "Man, it is hot in here!"
The other one says, "OMG, a talking muffin!"
Did you eat Chef Boyardee's food?
No, why?
Boy are deez nuts so big.
Don't see why people say that babysitting a toddler is hard. You just grease the bathtub, put them inside with some food and drink, and go do your business. I guarantee you that they will still be there when you return.
If you stay in the house, you might need to use sound cancelling headphones too, though.
What did Stephen Hawking have for breakfast? His left shoulder.