Fitness jokes
Knock Knock! Who's there? Candace Candace who? Can deez nuts fit in your mouth?
Me: How do you say yes in Spanish? You: Si. Me: Si if these nuts fit in your mouth.
How many hookers fit in a Cadillac?
About 4 in the trunk if you stack 'em right.
Why didn't the teddy bear go to the gym?
Because he didn't want to get ripped.
My girlfriend's name is Candice.
Can these nuts fit in your mouth? :D
Memes
Bros “fire” fit be like
Have you heard of the Xbox game Sea of Thieves?
See if these nuts fit in your mouth.
Not a joke, but here's a good workout, I guess:
Sit-ups: 50
Push-ups: 40
Squats: 30
Do 5 sets.
What time is it when you get home and you can walk walk home and walk walk?
I'm surprised BLESSEDBRIAN can fit through the door, considering how INFLATED his ego is.
What’s a rapper’s favorite exercise?
Heavy bars.
What do you call a black person having a fit?
A chocolate milkshake.
This dude is so fat, wearing the same damn clothes every day. Every time he turns around, it's his graduation day. He forgot to put a boomerang on his pants because they don't even fit anymore. Last time I saw him coming down the street, it was in a bucket of Popeye's chicken, extra crispy.
How do you fit three gay guys on a bar stool?
Flip it upside down.
Suzy: How did Jonah fit in the whale?
Teacher: Whales are very big but have small mouths, so Jonah did not actually fit in the whale.
Suzy: Well, the Bible says he did.
Teacher: He did not.
Suzy: When I get to heaven I will ask him how he fit in.
Teacher: How do you know he went to heaven? Maybe he went to hell.
Suzy: Then you can ask him.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Ahoy Mateys.
Ahoy Mateys who?
Ahoy mateys, balls fit in your mouth? LOLOLOLOLOLOL
Your mum is so fat, when she was sitting on a scale, the number couldn't even fit on the scale and came shooting out!
Your hairline can fit a truck without touching either side.
A girl did squats everyday with a 20 pound weight in her hand to finally text her boyfriend, "Show me your dick now!"
Most people my age have had sex. Not my fault I'm not able to fit in.
Why did the gym close?
It's because it just never worked out.