Fitness jokes
Yo mama is so fat, she can’t even fit in the suitcase.
How do you fit three gay guys on a bar stool?
Flip it upside down.
Yo forehead is so big it couldn't even fit in the United States.
“Which tool,” Andrea Bocelli asks Chris Doemges, “fits best in the mailbox?”
Doemges: “Probably the flathead screwdriver!”
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Wilma.
Wilma who?
Wilma dik fit in your mouth.
Me: How do you say yes in Spanish? You: Si. Me: Si if these nuts fit in your mouth.
Roses are red, violets are blue. I see you, I see you; you would have to work out.
A friend of mine used to be morbidly obese, but after lots of exercise and hard work... We were able to lift his coffin.
Q. What gets longer if pulled, fits snugly between breasts, slides neatly into a hole, chokes people when used incorrectly, and works well when jerked?
A. A seatbelt.
How many times does 50 fit into 9?
Get in a van and find out!
What did the substrate say to the active site?
"C'mon baby, we fit together, open my door lock to f**kin' key."
If the shoe doesn't fit, there's no evidence.
What’s an Emo’s favorite exercise?
The dead hang.
Entered what I ate today into my new fitness app, and it just sent an ambulance to my house.
Why couldn't the emo kid hang himself?
After eating through his feelings, the belt wouldn't fit around his neck.
What is Jesus's favorite exercise?
Cross Fit.
Yo mama is so fat, she couldn't even fit through the rabbit hole at first because she ate like a damn pig last night when we had dinner.
Daveon can barely fit on 5 pages.
Call me Willma, will my balls fit ya mouth?
What's the worst part about microwaving vegetables?
Fitting the wheelchair in.