Fitness Jokes

This joke includes potentially sensitive content.

How can you tell that a woman cannot fit through a vent because she got pregnant from a baby elephant ain't no telling who" in better shape the elephant or the woman i guess it's probably weight watchers.

This joke includes potentially sensitive content.

How do you fit a whale inside a car? A blender.

POV: Wine Taster in hell

I was, sitting with the best wine ever made on the table in front of me. this silhouette begins to speak, "you have risen to be the most superb Wine Taster on Earth. then you got run over by a truck hauling freshly made wine to a warehouse. your crimes are as follows: you left your high school prom date with another man after you got her pregnant, you let your mother believe that the cat ran away after you drowned it in the pool, and you never got married. how do you plead?" the man looked at the silhouette like it was a purple rabbit. "guilty," said the man, "but if you would be so kind would you at least tell me what the wine in front of me tastes and smells like I will take any punishment you deem fit." very well," said the silhouette, "but you will regret that request." out of the shadows comes a boy only looking 19 years old. the boy says "I will you taster today. I am confident about my sense of taste." the boy takes the first bottle and opens it, pours it into a wine glass, and swirls it around. He then takes a sniff and begins to drink, to the Wine Taster he says, "Mmmm, Taste like chicken."

Me: How do you say yes in Spanish? You: si Me: Si if these nuts fit in your mouth

Your mom is so small that she can fit in the luggage

How many hooker's fit in a Cadillac? About 4 in the trunk if you stack em right

Have you heard of the Xbox game sea of the thieves see if these nuts fit in your mouth

my girlfriends name is candice can thez nuts fit in you mouth:D

why didint the teddy bear go to the gym

because he didint want to get ripped

I'm surprised BLESSEDBRIAN can fit through the door, considering how INFLATED his ego is

This joke includes potentially sensitive content.

How do you fit three gay guys on a bar stool? Flip it upside down.

Suzy: How did johna fit in the whale? Teacher: Whales are very big but have small moths, so johna did not actually fit in the whale. Suzy: well the bible says he did Teacher: He did not Suzy: when I get to heaven I will ask him how he fit in Teacher: How do you know he went to heaven, maybe he went to hell Suzy: Than you can ask him.