Fitness jokes
Guess Stephen Hawking never had use for sweatcoin😂
Yo forehead is so big it couldn't even fit in the United States.
What's the worst part about microwaving vegetables?
Fitting the wheelchair in.
What's the best thing about being a pedophile? You can choose the fit profession where you find kids most.
What is white, black, and red and can't fit through a revolving door?
A nun with a spear through her head!
Memes
He's like gigachad but skipped neck day
When your legs forget how to work after leg day, I can't climb the stairs.
Michael Myers right behind me. Runs like I'm a track star!
What do you call a dick that doesn't fit in an asshole?
A misfit.
What kind of tree fits into your hand? A palm tree.
Yo mama is so fat, she can’t even fit in the suitcase.
Your mum is so fat that when she sat on the toilet, she couldn't because her fat ass can't fit on the toilet seat.
How can you tell that a woman cannot fit through a vent because she got pregnant from a baby elephant? Ain't no telling who's in better shape, the elephant or the woman. I guess it's probably Weight Watchers.
What do squats eat? Numbers.
Your earlobes are so big, you can fit your mom inside of them 5000 times and still have room for more!
Question: Do you know who Candis is?
Answer: Can dis dick fit in your mouth?
Zion is so fat that his dick can't even fit in his wife's pussy.
How do you fit a whale inside a car? A blender.
POV: Wine Taster in hell.
I was sitting with the best wine ever made on the table in front of me. This silhouette begins to speak, "You have risen to be the most superb Wine Taster on Earth. Then you got run over by a truck hauling freshly made wine to a warehouse. Your crimes are as follows: you left your high school prom date with another man after you got her pregnant, you let your mother believe that the cat ran away after you drowned it in the pool, and you never got married. How do you plead?"
The man looked at the silhouette like it was a purple rabbit.
"Guilty," said the man, "but if you would be so kind would you at least tell me what the wine in front of me tastes and smells like? I will take any punishment you deem fit."
"Very well," said the silhouette, "but you will regret that request."
Out of the shadows comes a boy only looking 19 years old. The boy says, "I will you taster today. I am confident about my sense of taste." The boy takes the first bottle and opens it, pours it into a wine glass, and swirls it around. He then takes a sniff and begins to drink, to the Wine Taster he says, "Mmmm, taste like chicken."
Touch your toes and hold them. Then spell "run." It will say, "r.u.n."
Your mom is so small that she can fit in the luggage.
Do you play Sea of Thieves? See if these balls fit in your mouth, gotteeeem!