Chimmy: (smoking because of fire place) Chimmy2: your to young to smoke
So my friend and I went camping at a Cold lake Campground and he jumped into it, without any warning, and so I asked him Wat-er you doing
What do you call a candle in armor?
A knight light
How do you make a cat go "woof"? .... douse it in gasoline and set it on fire! "woof!"
A kid is arrested for a school shooting threat he is then apprehended and asked why he wanted to do this. He responds with "what do you mean I already did it" then the police ran back to the school to aprehend the other people he was planing it with the cops busted in through the doors which caused a smoke trap to go off which then the cops saw three people walk in and the police begin to fire. But as the smoke began to clear the cops saw that the three people were 16 kids duck taped to rolling poles 4 per pole. Back to the station holding the kid being apprehended. the kid puts his feet up on a chair and said "Aww it pays to be lazy!"
Hey God, what are you making?
Just a wooden stick that lights on fire.
Sounds like a match made in heaven.
Cremation,
The last chance for a smoking hot body.
how can you light up a candle in a ship which does not contain any instrument and you are alone with just a packet of candles? ans:just throw one candle in sea the boat will become lighter
Build a man a fire he will be warm for a day, give him some tfox March and he will on fire
I had a friend who was a deep sleeper. One day, a fire started in his house. Now he's a really deep sleeper.
A priest and a rabbi run out of a burning church, and the priest says, "What about the children?" The rabbi says, "Fuck the children." And the priest says, "Do you think we'll have time?"
Person 1: Hey did you here about the circus fire? Person 2: No. Person 1: it was in-tents
What do you called Stephen Hawking on fire?
Hot Wheels
How do u turn a baby into a dog? Douse it in gasoline- light a match-*WOOF*
What do you call a retard in a house fire?
Flame Retardant.
Chuck Norris lit a campfire and humans saw the sun for the first time.
i use to work at a calendar factory but i got fired because i missed a few days
Jim and Allyn are 2 mates in the Air Force. They were paired up for a training exercise. They got up into the air and Jim said, "Okay Allyn, your helmet can control the missile when launched from the jet. Go ahead and test fire a missile and aim it at anything you want." Allyn fired the missile and had his eyes set on an abandoned building. Jim then said, "I also forgot, watch out for friendly fire." Allyn said "What?" as he looked over at Jim.
Build a man a fire, and he’ll be warm for a day.
Set a man on fire, and he’ll be warm for the rest of his life.
There are some sounds that everyone loves... - Shoes on gravel. - Crackling of fire. - The snapping necks of those who think they can disrespect you. - Cats purring.
