Finance jokes

Yo mama's so poor that she only watches Frozen to hear Elsa sing "Let It Go."

If an orphan wins the lottery, what do they have to use all of it on?

Years of child support!

What is Johnny Depp's new legal name?

Johnny in debt.

Hey any riding with Biden fans out there?

I ran out of gas and could really use a ride so if one of ya'll can call me and pick me up that'd be great and I can't get gas because I only have 20 bucks which is like 1-5 and a half, help me please.

So I went to the bank and a lady asked me to check her balance... so I pushed her over.

I work at a bank and an old woman asked me to check her balance.

So I pushed her over.

What is worse than seeing your sibling drown?

Getting the water bill.

I am like currency; people always trade me out for someone better.

Mom: Hey hun, need some money for lunch at school?

Son: No, I got 1k already.

Mom: Wait, what, how?

Son: Mom's wallet is magic.

Why do elephants never get rich?

Because they work for peanuts!

That is a "Penny-Farthing" bicycle. Dimes if you feed it beans.

Lol, I keep stealing my dad's medication money, and the best part is he never remembers.

What's the most expensive haircut you can get? Chemotherapy.

What do Boy Scouts and IG models have in common?

They both be fucking sugar daddies.

How do rappers make their money?

By dropping dimes.

Why did the rapper bring a calculator to the party?

To count his STACKS of CASH!

What do you call a rapper who can't afford jewelry?

"UNBLINGABLE"

What do you get when you cross a rapper with an accountant?

A rhyme scheme that's all about the Benjamins!

Why did the rapper go to the bank?

To withdraw some flow.

I was at the bank yesterday.

A lady asked to check her balance, so I pushed her over.