My favorite film is The Hunchback of Notre Dame.
I love a protagonist with a twisted back story.
"Jack Sparrow."
"Captain, Captain Jack Sparrow!"
"Jesus is the pioneer of Hollywood. He's still famous and my favorite idol."
Did you know Disney is making a movie for suicidal people?
They're calling it Finding Emo.
They're making a new Alien movie.
There are so many aliens you can't keep track.
What do iPhones and the Titanic have in common?
There's no Jack!
What would be the most heartbreaking scene in a dementia film? I forgor 💀.
I can't tell what's farther, the Great Wall of China, or how far Paul Walker flew out of his windshield.
A sister told her brother to walk to the store, buy some candy, and watch a movie with her while eating the candy.
But he couldn't walk because he has no legs. He couldn't buy candy because he has no arms. He couldn't watch a movie because he was blind, and he couldn't eat because he has no stomach. Who said he was real?
Director: Hi, we are making a huge cliffhanger in this movie.
Actor: Really? What do I do?
Director: You will play the part of the cliff. (holds up hanging rope)
Watching "50 Shades of Grey" was more painful than my uncle fisting me as a kid.