Film

Film Jokes

Movie

My favorite film is The Hunchback of Notre Dame.

I love a protagonist with a twisted back story.

Orphan

I told some orphan that you can see your family, but I meant Spider-Man: Homecoming...

Jesus

"Jesus is the pioneer of Hollywood. He's still famous and my favorite idol."

Alien

They're making a new Alien movie.

There are so many aliens you can't keep track.

Jack

What do iPhones and the Titanic have in common?

There's no Jack!

Movie

Did you know Disney is making a movie for suicidal people?

They're calling it Finding Emo.

Paul Walker

I can't tell what's farther, the Great Wall of China, or how far Paul Walker flew out of his windshield.

Kid

Do you know what you call a bunch of depressed kids?

"Suicide Squad!"

Brother

A sister told her brother to walk to the store, buy some candy, and watch a movie with her while eating the candy.

But he couldn't walk because he has no legs. He couldn't buy candy because he has no arms. He couldn't watch a movie because he was blind, and he couldn't eat because he has no stomach. Who said he was real?

Cancer

Did you hear about the new Pixar movie? It's about cancer patients. It's called "Finding Kemo."

Corona

Corona be like:

Eliminating half the population of boomers faster than Thanos.

*snap*

Cow

Why are theaters popular among cows?

They enjoy watching moovies.

Cliffhanger

Director: Hi, we are making a huge cliffhanger in this movie.

Actor: Really? What do I do?

Director: You will play the part of the cliff. (holds up hanging rope)

Uncle

Watching "50 Shades of Grey" was more painful than my uncle fisting me as a kid.