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Five little monkeys jumping on the bed,

One fell off and bumped his head.

The momma called the doctor and the doctor said…

“We’re calling Child Protective Services.”

What is the similarity between a joke and food?

Some people just don’t get them!

Immigration jokes just cross the line.

What do you call a joke without a punchline?

What do you call a boomerang that doesn’t come back? – A stick.

My life is a joke.

What do you call someone who points out the obvious? Someone who points out the obvious.

What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

You know what I saw today?

Everything I looked at.

What do you get if you eat 3.14 cakes?

Fat, you get Fat.

What? were you expecting a pi joke?

Why did little sally fall of the swings? Because she had no arms What did sally get for Christmas? Gloves! Only joking…she still hasn’t opened the box

Why couldn’t the T-Rex clap?

Because he’s dead.

Why did Mary fall off the swings? She got hit by a refrigerator

What do you get when you insert human DNA into a goat? Banned from the petting zoo!

im a big fan of white boards there re-marketable

Knock, Knock. Who’s there? Dave. Dave who? Dave proceeds to break into tears as his grandmother’s Alzheimers has progressed to the point where she can no longer remember him

What do you call a man with no Body and no nose

Nobody nose

What’s green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels

What do you call a cross between a gorilla and a monkey? – A cross.

What happens when you cross a rhetorical question with a joke?