Film jokes
Did you hear about the new Pixar movie? It's about cancer patients. It's called "Finding Kemo."
Corona be like:
Eliminating half the population of boomers faster than Thanos.
*snap*
Paul Walker is the best legend to go down in history. Change my mind.
Director: Hi, we are making a huge cliffhanger in this movie.
Actor: Really? What do I do?
Director: You will play the part of the cliff. (holds up hanging rope)
Why are theaters popular among cows?
They enjoy watching moovies.
Watching "50 Shades of Grey" was more painful than my uncle fisting me as a kid.
What’s Michael Jackson’s favorite movie?
Black and white.
Chuck Norris: "Chuck Norris doesn't fight, he just allows you to lose."
Me: "How come did you lose Return of the Dragon?"
Q: Why do orphans hate Fast and Furious movies?
A: Because they say "family" too often.
This kid yelled "Jenga" when we were watching a 9/11 documentary.
What actor do orphans hate?
Dom Terreto (family).
Why did the cow cross the road?
'Cause he wanted to go to a moooooooooooooooooooooooovie.
Yo mama played the iceberg in Titanic.
Why did the chicken enter the cave?
Because it wanted to get to the Dark Side.
They are making new versions of the Star Wars films. The names have only just come out.
There is Star Wars: Attack of the Trannies, Star Wars: The Trannie Awakens, Star Wars: Rogue Trannie, Star Wars: The LGBTQ Strikes Back, and then there is Star Wars: The Last Straight Man.
I just watched a documentary about beavers.
It was the best dam show I ever saw!
My grandpa warned people the Titanic would sink, but they wouldn’t listen, so he kept warning them. Then he was kicked out of the theater.
What is an orphan's favorite movie? Home Alone.
Why do orphans hate Batman the movie?
Because at least he gets noticed by people, and also he stole their life story!
I'm writing a movie about 9/11. It's called "September 11th Two Thousand Fun."