A pastor asked his child what his favorite bible verse was... He responded, "Keep watch," because he wanted a watch.
Favorite Jokes
What’s a homeless person's favorite food?
What's a prostitute's favorite snack?
Skittles. They love to taste the rainbow.
What's Damo's favorite food?
Big slongs.
You know chords, right? Well, you know what I love to do? To play with A-minor. You know, feel your fingers on A-minor. Gives you a sense of power, to just F A-minor.
But that's not my favorite thing to fiddle with. That would be the D of minors. It's just solid, you know. If you're clever you can have the D of minors into the C of minors. Or, though a bit tricky, the D of minors into the B of minors.
And at this point you've gotten the point and if I want to continue it would be a bit of a stretch.
What’s your favorite type of wood? Mine is Bollywood.
What is a carrot's favorite shop?
The wheelchair store.
What is an orphan's favorite toy?
A boomerang, because it comes back.
What is an emo's least favorite game? Fruit Ninja.
My favorite joke was: what's the difference between a teacher and a train?
My friend: “Vaporeon is my favorite Pokémon.”
Me: “Hey, did you kno-“
What is Stephen Hawking's favorite snack?
Vegetables.
What is a skeleton's favorite instrument? (comment below)
What's a psych ward worker's favorite incense?
Insurance fraud.
Q. What is the Titanic's favorite food?
A. Ice burger.
What's a person in a wheelchair's favorite sport?
Jousting.
Why did the little girl cry twice?
Because you wiped your bloody shitty cock on her favorite teddy bear.
What is your favorite color?
What is Beyonce's favorite fast food chain?
dairy QUEEEEEEENNNN!
1. Full name: John.
2. Proverb: work is not a rabbit, does not run.
3. Favorite meal: the sphinx with the sour cream.
4. Sexual orientation: sexually disorientated.
5. Mental health: mentally retarded.
6. Previous careers: funeral undertaking, after that two years in the circus as the main brown bear, after that in the church school for two years, after this experience five years as a screw in the jail for the worst criminals with the top degree of supervision and now working for the secret services in my home country after gaining the top-secret audit.
7. Favorite pets: dog, bumble bee named Maxo, a butterfly named Redwing and the lizard named Notail.
8. Favorite activities: washing the dishes, cutting the woods, vacuuming and playing hard rock.
9. Working motivation: none.
I hope that you will accept my curriculum vitae and that we will see each other soon already as new colleagues, I wish more or less. Kind regards, John.