I got some new jeans yesterday, until I realized they didn't fit me around the waist, so I went looking for a belt. I couldn't find one. Then I had a really good idea. I could attach a ton of watches together to make a belt! But then I just thought it was a waste of time.
Fashion Jokes
Why did the pervert sing "Gucci Gang"?
Because a woman just gave him a lil pump.
I tried to find a camouflage shirt, but I couldn’t find one.
What would a clock look like with no numbers?
Timeless!
What did one needle say to the other?
"You be looking sharp!"
Wanna hear a joke?
Your outfit. Har har!
What are a pedophile"s shoes called?
Answer: WHITE VANS
Yo mama is so ugly, the sunglasses walked away.
I wanted to make a belt out of watches, then I realized it was a waste of time!
One day Little Johnny’s class is having an English lesson. The teacher asks them, “Who can use the word intelligent in a sentence?” Little Mary says, “The teacher is very intelligent.” The teacher asks them, “Who can use the word fashionable in a sentence?” Little Suzie says, “They are very fashionable.” The teacher says, “Johnny, why don’t you have a go? Use the word dictate in a sentence.” Johnny thinks for a moment and then says, "Last night I heard Daddy asking Mommy, ‘Darling, how does my dick taste?’”
One day Little Johnny's class is having an English lesson. The teacher asks them, "Who can use the word intelligent in a sentence?" Little Mary says, "The teacher is very intelligent." The teacher asks them, "Who can use the word fashionable in a sentence?" Little Suzie says, "They are very fashionable." The teacher says, "Johnny, why don't you have a go? Use the word dictate in a sentence." Johnny thinks for a moment and then says, "Last night I heard Daddy asking Mommy 'Darling how does my dictate'"
Why is it poetic when they have plenty of those German sandals in the store? Because they're Birkenstock.
Wife: "How would you describe me?"
Husband: "ABCDEFGHIJK."
Wife: "What does that mean?"
Husband: "Adorable (A), beautiful (B), cute (C), delightful (D), elegant (E), fashionable (F), gorgeous (G), and hot (H)."
Wife: "Aw, thank you, but what about IJK?"
Husband: "I'm just kidding!"
How did the hipster drown?
He ice-skated before it was cool.
What does a house wear?
A dress.
What do you call it when a watch has too many belts?
A waist of your time.
What is a rabbit's favorite type of jewelry?
Carats.
What did the tie say to the hat?
You go on ahead, I'll just hang around.
What did the shoes say to the pants?
"SUP, BRITCHES!"
What shoes does a pedophile wear?
White vans.
