Why do special ED classes have fans? To keep the vegetables nice and fresh
Here's a list of puns, not all of them are mine.
1. Smaller babies may be delivered by stork, but the heavier ones need a crane.
2. Yesterday, I accidentally swallowed some food coloring. The doctor says I’m okay, but I feel like I’ve dyed a little inside.
3. My sister bet that I couldn’t build a car out of spaghetti. You should’ve seen her face when I drove pasta.
4. Getting the ability to fly would be so uplifting.
5. Two windmills are standing in a wind farm. One asks, “What’s your favorite kind of music?” The other says, “I’m a big metal fan.”
6. Why was the cookie sad? Because his mom was a wafer long!
7. Why didn’t the cat go to the vet? He was feline fine!
8. How do you make a good egg-roll? You push it down a hill!
9. That baseball player was such a bad sport. He stole third base and then just went home!
10. My parents said I can’t drink coffee anymore. Or else they’ll ground me!
Orphans more like or fans!!!!😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
Why was the stadium so hot? Because all the fans left!
why was the stadium so cold? Because of all its fans!
Q: I'm a famous athlete and I've got a lot of fan's.
A: Is that why I never see you sweat?
Why does it get hot after a baseball game?
Cuz all the fans have left.
What category of music did JFK like?
You could say he was a metalhead.
if u r a big fan of me go to the move and i kill the badguys a if u dont i will be mad and i will be sonic .exe lol
Jesus is a rock music fan
Because he like 9in nails
Did you hear about the kidnapping? Yeah, he woke up.
What do you call Amber Heard crying during the lawsuit?
A DEPPression.
(If you are a fan of either Johnny Depp or Amber Heard, you might get the joke)
(only Ninjago fans understand XD) if you look outside, and its really windy, its really cloudy, and the sky looks greenish... you better run, cause it has to be Morro! XD
Police: Hey man look at this! * throws cocaine at fan and flew back his face* Me: Are you okay? Police: Looks like I “crack” the case.
why do atletes cool down fast cause they have fans
wash your hands
Two Australians walk into a bar, they run into the ceiling fan immediately.
The coach of the Detroit Lions had put together the perfect football team. But then his quarterback got blindsided and was out for the season with a knee injury.
Then his backup went down with a concussion. He tried the trading route, free agents, but nobody any good was available.
One evening while watching the news from Iraq, he saw a young Iraqi soldier with an amazing arm. The soldier rifled a grenade on a perfect arc into a 4th story window from 100 yards, bam!
He tossed another directly into a tight group of 12 enemy fighters 80 yards away, ka-bam! Then a humvee passed, going 60 kph, boom! Another perfect shot!
Coach said to himself, "I got to have this guy. He's got the best arm I've ever seen!"
He tracks him down and convinces him to come to Detroit. The kid takes coaching perfectly, makes all the plays, and long story short, the Lions win the Super Bowl.
The Iraqi is now the Conquering Hero in pro football, and a huge story. But when the broadcast team tries to interview him, all he wants is to phone his mom.
"Mother," he yells over the phone, "We just won the Super Bowl!"
"Don't talk to me," the woman says. "You abandoned us. You can't be my son."
The young Iraqi begs, "Mom, you don't understand! Our team won the biggest game here in the U.S. Thousands of fans are screaming for me. The U.S. President is going to call me!"
"I don't care," his mother snaps. "Right now I can hear gunshots everywhere. Our block is like a ruin. Your brothers were beaten half to death last night, and your sister was nearly raped."
Then she says, "I can never forgive you for making us move to Detroit."
Once I went to a museum and over heard someone speaking to an employee for information.
“These are lying clocks, they tell how many lies a person tells.”
“oh cool”
“this is mother Teresa’s clock, the clock hasn’t moved because she never lied.”
“Makes sense”
“This is Abraham Lincoln’s clock. The hands only moved twice indicating he only lied twice.”
“Where’s Trump’s clock”
“Oh, we’re using it as a ceiling fan.”
And then I burst out laughing 'cause it’s so true.
Someone:hey are you a skeleton? A skeleton: course, I have a SKELE-ton of fans
A blonde crashes a airplane Officer: could you please explain to me what happened? Woman: It got so cold in the plane I turned the fan off. Officer: *face palms self* Also officer: Here's you sign
