Why did the orphan like milk?
Because their parents went to get milk and never came back!
Once, there was a brother and a sister that shared a YouTube channel. He named it "Penis Dick Marathon."
My grandad killed Hitler. He was such a great man!
Kariana: Dad and mom, what is this bullshit?
Treon: How did you find that?!
Kariana: It was under the cabinet where you told me to put the streamers. I found these under the cabinet, did she have another sister you didn't tell me about? Now tell the truth, or else!
Petina: Now what have we told you about going into things that are not yours!
Kariana: I just told you to say the fricking truth, now who is Faineni? Where is she? Who is she? What is her date of birth? Why do I have her bra under here and why....IS IT UNDER THE FRICKING CABINET!!!!! ANSWER ME!!!!!!!!!
Treon: We can't!
Kariana: BULLSHIT!!!!!!!!
What's 6ft long, red, and my girlfriend cries when I feed it to her?
A miscarriage.
What's an orphan's favorite sport?
Baseball, because they finally have a home.
When you ask your brother where his hairline is, and he points where it's supposed to be, and you say, "I don't see one there."
You're adopted, that's why your mom or dad never came back with the milk!
I love telling good news to my patients, like they survived the crash but their family died.