Family jokes
Why don't orphans do homework?
They don't have a home to do it in.
I would tell a joke about my abusive dad, but I can only think of the punchline.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
They don't know where home is.
Hey dad, I'm hungry!
Hi hungry, I'm dad. Why did you name me this way, why why why?
What did Onett and Threed reply to their child?
"I love you Twoson."
I was looking for my sister... I looked down at my feet and saw her.
Yo mama so fat, she is fat.
Child: I am hungry.
Dad: Hi hungry, I am dad!!!
Child: *groans* *walks away*
Your mom is a mom!
How many fat people are in my house?
20, counting the kids in the basement.
Your mama is so ugly, her reflection ran away!
Your mama is so ugly, she doesn't have to flush the toilet. She already scared the shit out of it.
Your mama is so fat. Her high school picture is an aerial photograph.
Your mom's so fat, she fell.
Why do orphans have no parents?
Say your joke in the comments.
Son: "Mom, am I adopted?"
Mom: "Yes."
Son: "Where are my real parents?"
Dad: "We are your real parents, so... GET OUT!"
What do you call your mom?
Monkey.
What can orphans not do in school?
20 years later
Johnny: Hey dad.
Dad: Yea?
Johnny: Fuck you, I ain't comin' back to your grave in 16 years, then ima come back, BITCH!
Dad: Doing the same thing I did to you and your mother, ay? I deserve it :( ;O not real...NOT A FUCKING ALL.
Johnny: Yea you kinda fucking do.
Dad:...
After having a win at bingo, Ethel splashed out on some venison for tea.
During the meal, her daughter asked her mum what it was, to which she replied with a little smile... "It's what I call your father."
Little Jimmy threw down his knife and fork and jumped up sayin', "Oh My God! Don't eat it!!! It's a fucking Dick!"