Family jokes

What is the difference between an orphan and an apple tray? The apple tray gets picked.

My sis was funny but sad because I have a boy and she doesn't.

Where do orphans go to celebrate graduation?

Their parents.

My sister: See you at home in about an hour.

Me: Okay.

My sister: Sister, where are you? *She looks out the window.*

Me: Sis, I'm here, can't you see me?

Sister: OMG, she's dead!

Me: Yeah, I know, but can't you see me?

Yo mama is so hairy that she brushed it like her hair and put pins on it.

What did the orphan say when his mum asked, "What do you want for dinner?"

He replied, " "

Girl: Rip, mother, I love you.

Me: Sorry for your loss.

Girl: Stop, I have a boyfriend.

Me: Stop, I have a mother.

Knock! Knock!

Who's there?

Momma?

Momma who?

Big Momma!

Why does an orphan have an iPhone X?

Because they have no home button.

Why are orphans always on the toilet?

Because they don't have anyone to give them some toilet paper!

Ok, ok, who is trying to be my "long lost brother"? Because last time I checked, I didn't have any sisters or brothers, so stop trying to steal my fame from me and give up. A lot of other people already know you are fake, so get off this website OR JUST STOP!!!

Karens yell, I scream, my mum fucks me.

One day, the milkman came to drop off milk.

The boy asked the milkman, "Do you know where my dad is?"

The milkman replies, "I am your dad," then runs off like Batman!

If an orphan got hit, will they go tell their parents?

I saw an orphan and asked them if they had parent permission.

Son: Dad, what are those two huge balloons on mommy's chest?

Dad: I don't see balloons, but I see boobs. I mean, yes, balloons.

Son: Are you sure they're balloons? Yesterday I heard Uncle Frank trying to get a milk dispenser working.

Why don't orphans go to the park?

Because their parents aren't there to push them on the swing!

Why can't orphans go on vacation?

The last time they did, they fell in the toilet and had no one to help them out. Ugh!

Your mom.

Why can't orphans play baseball?

Because they can't find home.