Family

Family jokes

Orphan

Can an orphan child be arrested for vandalism, or will the officers ask for their parents to talk to?

Wife

My wife told me to hang her the salt, so I beat the shit out of her. My name's Kyle, by the way.

Dad

I hope you have to dip your Oreos in water because your dad never came back with the milk.

Memes

Suicide

My mom said she would miss me if I committed suicide, so we made it double.

Dad

Your dad went on America's Got Talent for "smoothest way to leave their child."

Sister

Hi guys, jokes for sister.

So I was listening to a song about "I hate you, are annoying, sister. I'm small and I'm smart," and when I showed it to her, she killed me, and later I was dancing and crying.

Orphan

Orphan: Wanna have a sleepover?

Friend: But you're an orphan.

Orphan: Just wanted a place to sleep tonight!

Diary

The guy who stole my diary just died. My thoughts are with his family.

Dad

When I was born, I saw you at the adoption center alone.

That day your dad got milk. 😬😬😬😬😬😬😬😬😬😬

Orphan

Why don’t orphans play baseball? Cause they don’t know where home is!

Orphan

My balls when I see Tazzaro: boioioioioioing.

Why don’t orphans play baseball? Cause they don’t know where home is!

Why don’t orphans play baseball? Cause they don’t know where home is!

Why don’t orphans play baseball? Cause they don’t know where home is!