Family jokes

So, Dora is having a sleepover with her cousin Diego at Dora's house. Later that night, Dora's mom hears someone screaming, "Go Diego go!" for at least a couple of minutes, and then it stops, and she goes back to sleep.

But then she hears the same thing a couple of minutes later, so she walks in and hears "Go Diego go!" She walks over to Diego's sleeping bag and looks, and it's empty, so she walks over to Dora's sleeping bag and looks in and sees Dora getting f

... by Diego and hears Dora saying, "Go Diego go!" while moaning.

Why don’t orphans have sex?

Because they have no one to call “daddy.”

What is soccer like when you lose your soccer ball?

Orphan: "My Parents."

So, my mom looked in the mirror today, and we need a new one.

Tell an orphan: if you got no parents, clap your hands.

What is the difference between an orphan and an apple?

The apple gets picked.

Yo mama is so stupid, she got hit by a parked car.

My grandfather says I’m too reliant on technology. I call him a hypocrite and unplug his life support. 😄😆🔥👍

What does a dad and the Twin Towers have in common?

Once they're gone, they never come back.

I called my mom on Alexa, and she told me, "Please take out the trash." I said, "But I can't, you're not here."

Today, my family visited Disneyland. When we got to the hall of fame, I was shocked to find a statue of the BielefeldMan.

The tour guide said, "That’s Lewandisney. He owns the biggest collection of Disney TAP-INS and is a Mickey Mouse clubhouse member." Well done Lewandisney!

Sister: Hey sis, how are you today?

Me: Oh, good, you?

Sister: Good, 'cause I heard you finally got a good living life.

"Where are my balls? Down in your mom."

Why are orphans sad?

Don't ask, or their parents may... oh wait, carry on.

Why are orphans so bad at learning about ancient Egypt? They don't know what mummies are.

Why do orphans hate Cocomelon?

Because the parents are in every episode.

Why can't an orphan play baseball?

He can't run home.

God, those orphans were putting up such a fight, I had to lock 'em in the basement.

If you hit an orphan on the arm, what will he do? Tell his parents?

There is going to be a wild party at the orphanage, the parents aren't home.