Family jokes
What do blind kids and orphans have in common?
They both can't see their parents.
Your family in a nutshell.
Why was Timmy the only happy person in his family?
Timmy is dead.
Why was Sally at the hospital after her parents left? Because they put her up for adoption.
I just wanted to say to never let go of family; they are everything. Never let anyone walk all over you. And if you are with me, like this quote.
What do sex and food have in common?
My sister makes it better than my cousin.
Why can't orphans be gay?
Because they don't have anyone to call them "daddy."
The Mexican landscaper came to cut our lawn. My mom was happy then asked him, "Can I have some of your burrito?" He said, "Yeah." I said, "Whatever."
A few minutes later, my mom told me to cut the lawn. I said, "Why do I have to do it? That's what he's there for." My mom said, "He's going to do the burrito for me." Then I said, "Okay." I finished cutting the lawn and went in the house. I see my mom giving the landscaper a blow job. I said to my mom, "What are you doing?" My mom said, "What does it look like? I'm having my burrito." The landscaper told me that I missed a spot while cutting the lawn.
Hi, I'm Adopt, and you guys hurt my feelings. It is not God :(😔😞😔🥺. I'm just a kid. I'm 7.
Why are orphans gay?
They call everyone "daddy."
What’s the difference between an orphan and Pikachu?
Pikachu, I choose you!
Yo mama is so fat that when she walked past the TV, I missed three episodes.
Why can’t an orphan play soccer?
If he can’t find home, he can’t find goal.
Why can’t orphans be gay?
Because they don’t have anybody to call “daddy.”
Adopted kid:
Hey, Alex, what are you doing?
Alex:
Nothing, just playing my game. Anyways, you know you can call me "dad."
Adopted kid:
OK, dad Alex.
Alex:
Oh, come on! My game! I’m winning. Let’s go!
Adopted kid:
I’m so glad I have a mom.
Why are orphans so famous for their jokes?
Because everyone says go big or go home!
How to get rich:
Step 1: Tell an orphan he will get a family.
Step 2: Knock out the orphan.
Step 3: Cut open the orphan.
Step 4: Well there [are] organs.
Step 5: Do it again.
And nobody will call the cops 'cause they got no family.
I wish I could kill my family, but you realize you're an orphan.
Like this if you are in foster care.
Why can’t orphans play baseball?
Because they can’t find home.